Stolen Princess

32. Never Enough

"Please!" he groans, his face contorting and twisting, and flashing with purple sparks of lightning. Still, I add more. Waiting for this pain inside of me to ebb. For all the wrong he's done me to fade... even a little. Only it becomes more vivid as I stare at him, I can hear his cruel laugh echoing off of empty hallways as he corners me, feel the cracking of his hands against my face, the crushing of his boot to my fingers, the snapping of my wrist in his grasp. And it all hurts... worse.

"Aaahhh!!!" I scream in pain of my own, pouring in another measure of magic. Alek is unable to speak as he stares at me in wide eyed horror and fear. I suppose that should feel sweet. His face the one in terror instead of mine. Only... I feel just as empty.

"Danaya!" Sosha calls, and I startle as she breaks into the swirling orb of magic, "You have to stop!"

"You don't know what he's done!" the goddesses shout from my chest. But really, I feel small again. So small and lost. He's always made me helpless, but now he's made me a monster too. I hate what I am in this moment. Hate that he's still damaging me, even when I take my vengeance.

"It won't help, Wren," Sosha's voice is firm but gentle over the sound of the storm I've brought around us. Lightning crackles and I bellow in pain once more as her words strike home. I don't want them to be true. I've waited so long for justice...

"He needs to feel it!" I scream, turning on him again, I raise his rigid body into the air, sending another bolt through him, "He needs to understand how much this hurt... what he took from me... all that peace... all those years... who I could've been if he hadn't - if he hadn't hrut me!"

"It won't work," Sosha shouts, "You can't make him hurt enough for it to go away... that hollowness in your chest... not even killing him will do it."

I feel a warm hand touch my shoulder and I turn to find Sosha standing next to me, tears streaming down her face as her expression twists in her own pain. I've suspected she understood more than she'd let on... and now I'm sure.

"How do I make it stop?" I sob, my chest aching with the fOrce of my tears. With the wealth of unanswered pain. And we both know I'm not talking about the magic storm that swirls stronger with each moment that passes.

"I don't know," she whispers at last, shaking her head. She looks like just another girl in that moment. Just another girl who's been hurt like me, "But it's not this," she repeats, nodding in Alek's direction.

I look to him again, and I know she's right. I'm seconds from tearing his flesh from his bones in the greatest flow of power I've ever experienced and still... that powerlessness from so long ago still sits within me, like the uninvited companion its always been.

"Alright," I answer her, but this time it's just my voice that says it. Just me. I close my palms and the world goes still once more. Alek falls back to the earth, still but not qutie dead. And I'm standing once more in my father's arena... in search of freedom I can't seem to catch hold of.

I turn towards the stands, and find them desimated by my ugly storm. Courtiers and commoners are in chaos of fear, trying to escape the crashing structure and the last remnants of flying sand and dust.

My eyes find his throne, like a habit I can't break. And he's there, staring at me, blank and deadly in his expression.

"We need to go -" Sosha urges, tugging on my arm, but I'm out of energy. Out of magic.

"This - means - war!" My father's voice slices through the air to me as I back at him. All I ever wanted was for him to love me. It's all I was trying to win after all.

"Wren! Run!" Leif shouts, and I realize both of them are pulling me along, out of the arena, as my father's knights turn on us, swords drawn. I'm so tired, so spent, I let them lead me away for another few strides before I turn towards the edge of camp and run with them.

"What about the others?" I shout as we sprint towards the edge of the forest. It's the only place I'll be safe.

"You have to make it, or we all die, Danaya," Leif explains, puffing from beside me as our feet gallop over the field Alder healed.

Ah yes, the blood vows. I bite my lip to keep from weeping as we reach the edge of the trees. I'm nearly home, now. Whatever happens next - for now, among these trees, I've made it home.

"We can hold them off," Sosha shouts, shoving me further into the tree, but I plant my feet and turn to fight.

Only fools go into the Shadow Forest. And they'd be fool to come after me.