ukiyo

vorfreude

vorfreude

(n.) (german.)

meaning:- the joyful anticipation from imaging future pleasures

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recommended songs for this chapter:-

i. blue and gray - bts
ii. magic shop - bts

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on days I hate being myself, days I want to disappear forever

let's make a door in your heart

open the door and this place will await

it's okay to believe, the Magic Shop will comfort you

- magic shop, bts.

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"Advik, ethuku ivalo addam pudikara. There's no way we're skipping your PTM meeting. Last time eh etho solli namma thaniya meet panom ellaryum."

Advik huffed and whined, "Amma please ma. Namma thaniya meet panlam ma."

Sivaangi sighed and placed the grocery bags on the counter. She leaned over and asked,

"Yen? Enna prachanai?"

Advik stared at her for a moment before looking away and shook his head, "Onnum illa."

Sivaangi sighed, "Advik, unnaku enna prachanai nu sonna thane ennala ethavathu panna mudiyum?"

Advik met her gaze warily, "Neenga vantha ellarum oru mathiri papanga."

She furrowed her eyebrows, "Yen?"

He looked down at the floor, "Appa enga nu kepanga."

Sivaangi felt the air get knocked out of her lungs. She stared at her son, trying to think thoughts but her mind seemed to come at a standstill. In that moment, for a fraction of a second, she felt bad for him. For his unfortunate luck that he had to be her son.

What would she say to that? She was confused. Was it because he wanted to not hear such things from others or did he genuinely feel the lack of a father figure in his life that made him so reluctant to such things?

Sivaangi had never coached Advik. Sure, she taught him some basic things but she believed parenting was about letting them explore and understand the world on their own, while keeping a protective eye on them. Now she was wondering if there needed to be a balance. Someone who would have taught him the things he needed to know.

Her phone rang, breaking her out of her trance. Advik peeked at her phone on the counter. He grinned instantly when he saw the name, "Ashwin." flash on it.

"Driver uncle hi!!!!" he shouted into the phone. Ashwin chuckled and said, "Hi Advik. Enna panra?"

"Ippo than school lenthu vanthen."

Ashwin hummed, "Amma enga?"

"Inga than iruken," Sivaangi said, putting away the groceries.

Ashwin, "Enna rendu naala phone message ethume illa?"

Sivaangi smiled, "Sorry, romba busy. Recording, aparam Advik."