Nīpan

firewhiskey and a letter

It had been a few weeks since the beginning of Emerald's sixth year at Hogwarts. She was finally starting to go back to her old self, slowly. 

Cedric saw her as often as he could, the rest of the time she spent with her friends. Her and Hestia had gotten closer since that night. Emerald had woken up with Hestia's arms still around her, and instead of being scared she felt safe. Like Lucius couldn't hurt her here. 

She had been avoiding Draco as much as possible without being too obvious. Whenever they talked, Emerald pretended to be reading, writing; anything so she wouldn't have to look at his eyes. If he noticed, he didn't say anything. 

Cedric was getting a bit restless, she could tell. He wanted her to talk to him badly, but she just couldn't. She couldn't tell him she'd been with someone else, choice or not. He would be absolutely devastated. So, she kept it bottled up, tucked deep inside her lockbox filled with painful memories. Occlumency had been her best friend for months.

Make no mistake, it still hurt, but her dissassociation from the subject required her to not bring light to these emotions. She couldn't afford to be weak, not now. 

Barty had met with her one last time in those last weeks of summer, telling her he would be disguised as the Defense Against The Dark Arts professor this year. She learned he was posing as Alastor "Mad-Eye" Moody, an ex auror who was crude and unfeeling. Granted, that could just be Crouch.

Now she was headed to the Great Hall for breakfast with her friends. She spotted them almost immediately and sauntered over to them. 

"Well hello sexy," Hestia growled playfully at her. Emerald laughed and sent a wink her way, playing along. 

"Hi darling, you left too soon this morning, I miss waking up to you naked!" Emerald cooed, carressing her friend's face lovingly and brushing her fingers over her lips. The rest of the table gawked as the girls fell into a fit of giggles. 

They were still catching their breath when Adrian sat down across from them.

"Do I want to know?" He asked, his eyebrows pulled together in confusion. 

"Oh we were just discussing our scandalous extracurricular activities with each other," Hestia told him, mischief lacing her voice.

"Yep, definitely didn't want to know!" Adrian started loading up his plate with biscuits and bacon. 

"Hey did you hear we're hosting the Triwizard Tournament this year?" Ivy says through a mouthful of oatmeal.

"Really? Do you know who's participating?" Emerald asks.

"No, but I hope Castelobruxo comes, I've always wanted to meet the Brazilians." 

"I bet Ilvermony will come," Hestia says, "Bloody Americans always have to stick their noses where they don't belong." Everyone nods and murmers in agreement. The conversation stalls for a bit as everyone tries to finish their food. Emerald lets her eyes wander to the Hufflepuff table, looking for her sweet boyfriend.  She turns up with nothing however, and dread seeps in. 

What if something happened to him? 

What if Crouch hurt him?

What if Voldemort went back on his promise?

Emerald started hyperventilating, clutching her chest and squeezing her eyes shut. She could hear her friends asking if she was okay, but it faded into the background as a high pitch ringing took over. She was drowning on air, choking slowly in her panic that Cedric could be gone. Then she felt herself falling, it felt like hours but in reality it was only seconds. Her head hit the floor with a thump and spots filled her vision.

Suddenly she was pulled from the darkness by a special voice.

"Emerald! Are you with me sweetheart? Please!" Her eyes focused on her boyfriend's concerned face. His mouth was pinched and his hands were in her hair. A smile grew on her face and she was finally able to sit up. When she did she threw her arms around him and buried her face into his jumper. 

"You're okay!" She whispered happily in his ear. His strong arms held her in place for who knows how long before he responded.

"Yeah, sweetheart, I'm okay."

***

News had travelled fast about Emerald's...incident. Some of the prejudice Gryffindors used it to their advantage, mock fainting in the halls and laughing at her at mealtimes. 

Emerald simply ignored them and went about life as usual. She went to class, sat with her friends, visited Cedric, studied, and went to bed. All was well, except everytime Cedric was out of her sight for too long she would have to rush to the bathroom and calm her erratic breathing down. It only took a bit of Occlumency and five minutes, but it was very inconvenient and she didn't know how to make it stop. 

She tried keeping Cedric as close to her as she could at all times, but he grew suspicious and she had to distance herself a bit. She tried distracting herself with games of exploding snap and wizard's chess, but she kept losing and began to grow bored. 

Now she was hooked on firewhiskey, and it was doing it's job perfectly. All she needed was a sip here and there throughout the day, as well as a glass at every meal. She would start to feel a little buzz and her smile stayed plastered on her face for the rest of the day.

She didn't even notice Cedric anymore.

But Cedric noticed her. 

He smelled the liquor on her breath everytime they kissed. He watched her stumble through the hallways and blame it on clumsiness. He watched the love of his life go in a downwards spiral that he didn't know how to stop. 

He had finally had enough when she tried to have sex with him under the influence. 

"What's wrong?" She had asked, slurring her words together and blinking sleepily. 

"You're drunk, Emerald." 

"I am not! I just love you so much and want to be with you!" Her head rolled to the side and she struggled to pick it back up again. 

"How much have you had?"

"Only..." she pinched her thumb and pointer finger together, "a tiny bottle or two." She started laughing hysterically until she belched. She covered her mouth in embarrassment but then started laughing again, like it was the funniest thing in the world. When she got no reaction from him she turned serious, all traces of laughter gone. 

"If you hate my body just say that."

"I don't hate your body Emerald you're drunk!" He shouted. "I am not taking advantage of you when you're like this, and that's final." 

"Party pooper!" She pointed at him. He looked at her with concern etched on his face. What happened to make his Emerald act like this? She wouldn't talk to him, and he had no idea what else to do.

Just then an owl flew in through the open window and dropped an envelope on Emerald's face. She went to open it, but while struggling she managed to fall asleep. 

Despite it being an invasion of privacy, Cedric couldn't help but slip the letter out of her hands. The writing was familiar, but he couldn't place where from. 

Dearest Emerald, 

I miss our meetings every day and can't bear to be apart from you. I need to see you. 

Meet me in the astronomy tower tonight at midnight. 

I'll be waiting,

Lucius