FATE

Chapter 11

Badriyyah

We wrote EEP exams today, a general entrepreneurship course offered by level 3 and 4 students and it was okay. We read and answered past questions and surprisingly enough, some of the questions we answered were questions from past years. I can't help but think of Deejah though.

She didn't participate in our readings and yesterday I made Ammi dragged her out of the house as she dropped us at school where we met Fa'iza and some other friends. She was so out of it and did nothing but stared at us as we read the handouts and answered questions. She told others she had a massive headache but I knew better.

So after the exams, I rushed back home because I have alot catching up to do and by that, I mean sleeping. I didn't sleep much last night because I was reading and my sleeping pattern is actually messed up right now. Ammi was not around, she told us she'll be out. She had shipments coming in today. Ammi runs a shop along BUK road, "Zainab's collections" where she sells all kinds of clothing materials, shoes, bags, jewelries, cosmetics, decor, lighting and kitchen accessories.

So I was surprised to see Deejah at home. She was back earlier than I expected. So I went up to her and stood before her. "How was the exams?" I asked to which she just shrugged and told me to get out of her way. I did and she went up to her room and shut the door. I stood for few minutes wondering what was that and I made up my mind to get something out of her today. So I dropped my veil and bag in the living room and got myself a cup of water because I can't face her dehydrated. She'll be very tough to crack but I'm not having it today. So I braced myself and headed to her room.

I was surprised to find the door opened, if she's in one of her moods, she often locks the door from the inside and leave the key in, so there's no way in until she lets you in. But to my surprise, the door was opened. I found her lying down on her back, facing upwards. Whether or not she saw or heard me come in, she wasn't fazed. I sat by the edge of her bed and let a moment of silence ensured before asking her what was wrong and she ignored me just like I predicted she would.

"Khadijah, you have to tell me what has been bothering you for days, if it's something we did, you tell us and we apologize but right now nobody knows what's going on with you and you're not helping yourself keeping it all bottled in. She ignored me once again. But I kept going. If it were any other day, I would've left without sparing her another glance but I've made up my mind to somehow get to the bottom of this today.

"And what was that earlier? Concerning the exam stuff. You can't keep ignoring me Deejah i'm not leaving.

"What about it?" She snapped.

"What do you care if I fail? It's not like you're that concerned so drop the act. I don't see how my failure affects you so please Badriyyah leave me alone and mind your business."

"What?" I asked aghast. "Is that what you feel Deejah? How you feel?"  I countered.

"Well you're wrong, I care about you a huge lot Khadija. Even if I don't show it because I don't know how to. Because you don't let me but believe me I do Deejah, we all do. And not because we pity you, no we care about you because we're family. And family care, love and protect each other."

"I'm not sure about the exams though, if i'm lucky I could get a D and if luck is not by my side i'll fail the course." She nonchalantly said.

"But why? We've been reading for the course but you chose not to read with us Khadija. Why?"

"I don't know, I'm just tired Badriyyah, okay? Tired of everything but you wouldn't understand." She said.

"No, you don't know that. I might not relate but that doesn't mean I wouldn't understand. You can trust me." I said.