Our World

Chapter 13

Perrie's POV:

I should have never told her. That was honestly the biggest mistake I ever made. I knew this would happen.

She is avoiding me.

Ever since she found out about what happened, we always slept in the same bed until I explained everything in detail. She hasn't touched me once after our almost kiss incident and I'm not sure if she's avoiding me because of that or because of my story.

She probably thinks it's my own fault too.

I know she said she would remind me it wasn't my fault until I believed her, but for the last week she hasn't even talked to me for more than two minutes. She could've just told me she thought I was an idiot. No need to avoid me at all costs.

Everything inside of me is aching for her. I really need to talk to her when she gets home. I've tried to talk to her before, but she always found somewhere to go, not this time.

I hear the front door open and close, so I hurry out of my room to not let her slip into her own room, where she'll lock herself up for the rest of the evening. Yeah, she is really making an effort to avoid me.

"Jade!" I yell louder than intended, which makes her stop dead in her tracks abruptly. "Can we please talk?" God, I'm literally talking to her back and I can still feel the nerves running through my veins. Why does this woman make me so nervous?

She doesn't even turn around to answer me. "I still have some work I need to finish." It doesn't even sound convincing. Is she even trying?

"Jade, it's Friday. You have a whole weekend to finish that. Please come sit down with me for a minute." I can see her hesitate, but she takes another step to her room. "Please." My voice breaks while I speak and I can barely hold back the tears.

Did Jade feel like this when I avoided her all those months? Wow, I'm a really shitty friend. I didn't realize how much this shit can affect people. Granted, I never ignored her or actively ran away in our own house. I did, however, leave the house as often as possible.

Jade turns around slowly and her eyes are filled with regrets. Her eyes fill with tears too as our eyes lock. When the hell did we become two overemotional chicks? "I don't think that's a good idea, Pez."

"You don't even know what I am going to say." I counter quickly. I want to step closer to her, but I'm afraid she'll back away and that would break my heart.

How did we go from almost always touching to not even speaking to each other overnight? Jade looks like she's fighting a battle inside before she makes her way to the couch and sits down, looking up at me expectantly.

I sit down beside her but make sure to leave some space between us. I take a deep breath and under Jade's gaze, I suddenly forget the whole speech I had prepared for her.

"I, uhm..." I fiddle with my fingers nervously and look up at Jade. Her warm and kind eyes make me calm down almost completely.

"Look, I don't know what happened to us all of a sudden, but I do know that I fucking hate this,, so please tell me what's wrong. Do you think it was my own fault too because I..."

"Perrie Louise Edwards, don't even finish that. Like I have told you before, stop blaming yourself. I'm not avoiding you because of that."

My eyes shoot up at that. "So you do admit that you have been avoiding me?" Her eyes don't meet mine and I can see her shake her head to herself.

"No, I mean, I don't know. Well... Yeah, I have, but it doesn't have anything to do with that. I can promise you that, Pez. You didn't make a mistake by telling me." She tries to smile at me, but it's the fakest smile I have ever seen.