His Greatest Redemption [REUPLOADED]

17

I think I was about eight when I realized my parents weren't like others, but instead every bit of fucking toxic that you could think of. It was one of those days where our cook, Franny, was watching over us because my dad was MIA and my mother was passed out from all thr drugs she took the night before, and I was confined inside the four walls of my bedroom, staring helplessly at the television when an advertisement for Dawn Dish Detergent cut off the show that was playing.

It was a regular fucking ad, but to me, it was an eyeopener. I wasn't a naive child, so I knew my parents weren't...typical people, but I hadn't been around anything else to realize that not everyone's parents were like mine.

The ad was based around a nice, happy family sitting around the table eating dinner, which I guess would subsequently lead to dirty dishes, hence this is where the detergent comes in.

But all of that was beside the point.

That family acted nothing like mine. The father was actually at the table and the mother was sober enough to actually eat her food. The kids smiled at each other, at their 'parents'. They looked so happy. Carefree. They radiated an unfamiliar sense of normalcy that I wanted so badly.

I wanted to be acknowledged by my mamma, I wanted what they had. And despite the fact that I knew it would never be possible for me, I still let myself get disappointed over and over again. I let her hurt me time after time and I still couldn't seem to let her go. 

She was just a dead soul walking in the shell of who she used to be.

I took her abuse as love instead because at the time, anything was better than nothing. And then I woke up, and realized she didn't love me at all.

I shivered as I ran my fingertips over the top of the glass cup, keeping my eyes focused on the clear liquid inside. It would appear as water to anyone else, but it was really vodka. I brought the  cup to my nose, inhaling the pungent smell. I didn't like vodka, but the burn was appreciated.

"Are you alright, Babygirl?" Elena, the older lady whom I only met twenty minutes ago, looked at me with worried eyes, her dark eyebrows furrowed as she watched me. I'd found out that her husband worked for Spade, but I still didn't understand the relationship she had with any of them.

Forcing the pathetic poor me thoughts away, I forced a gentle smile, "I look like a zombie reincarnated, don't I?" I pushed my glasses up, scrunching my nose up in the process. Thanks to Ronan, I wasn't squinting to see anymore. He not only found my glasses, but my contacts as well. I liked him.

She frowned, "Are you sleeping?"

"At night? Sure. Through the night? No, not really." I pulled my bottom lip in between my teeth.