I miss you like a little kid//Junior And Jake//Jevon

Mr. Faggy

TW: bullying, homophobia, f-slur, violence, panic attack, abuse, self harm, homophobic slurs
It was October 14th 2021, Jake was laying in bed, he never slept, he was just scrolling through tik tok. He was trying to find ideas for his doll sculptures. He pauses the tik tok he's watching about some girl cleaning her room to check what time it is.7:02 am. Jake realizes that the bus comes at 7:10 so he shoots up to get ready. He hops out of bed and trips over a pile of dirty clothes, falling face first, groaning. 'I really need to clean my room' he thought. As he's getting his black jeans on, he hears thumps aggressively coming up the staircase. Shit. Jake hurries up and throws a sweater over his head, pairing it with some random black jean jacket in the dirty clothes pile he tripped over previously. His dad, Lukas, slam opens Jake's door, making a dent in his wall.
"Jake. It's 7:08. What the hell are you doing in here." He says in an aggressive tone.
"Shit, sorry dad I woke up late, I guess I forgot to set my alarm" he lied.
"Don't let it happen again. Now hurry the fuck up"
"Yes sir" Lukas left the house and got in his truck, leaving for work. Jake grabbed his backpack, swinging it over his shoulder, and walked out the door. Right as he was walking outside the bus came and he walked on. He walked down the aisle for a while before seeing him. Jake sat down behind the boy, looking over the seat to watch him. Devon Evans. Devon was around 5'6, light brown skin, with short, dark, curly hair. He had chocolate brown eyes and brownish pink lips. Devon was reading a true crime story, he looked so interested in it. Jake was about to talk to him before he was interrupted by his cousin, Junior, sitting next to Devon.
"Hey Dev" Junior spoke, Devon didn't look up from his book, just hummed then responded.
"Hi Junior"
"Are you reading about crime again? Doesn't that freak you out?" Junior asked, laughing. Devon rolled his eyes and shook his head no.
"Not really, I think it's interesting" Jake thought it was so cute that Devon liked crime. It's not the topic itself that Jake thought was cute, just when Devon talks about the book he just read his eyes light up and he smiles. Jake hasn't ever talked to Devon before but he wants to experience Devon talking about crime to him, just to see that sparkle in his eye up close rather than across the hall or classroom. Around 5 minutes later, the bus finally came to a stop in front of the school. All the kids got up at the same time and started pushing other kids in order to get off the bus before the others. Jake kept getting pushed to the end of the line and was off the bus last. Junior and Devon were already inside at their lockers. Jake sighed and walked to his locker, he tried putting his combination and was wrong. He sighed and then tried again, right as he was about to open the locker, he got shoved into it. 'ow, fuck' he thought to himself.
"Freak!" Oliver yelled, walking away and laughing. Jake sighed again and then put in his combination and opened his locker. He put his bag in and grabbed out his binder. Right as he shut his locker he jumped. Devon.
"Hey, Jake right? You are Junior's cousin" Jake felt his cheeks heat up, which he didn't understand so he just ignored it. He smiled with his teeth.
"Yeah that's me, what's up" Jake responded.
"I'm Devon, if you didn't know, if you ever need anything just tell me" Devon said, putting his hand on Jake's shoulder and smiling at him. Jake felt a warm feeling in his heart and smiled back.
"Thank you Devon"
"Of course Jake, anytime," Devon smiled at him again, "What class do you have next?"
"Oh um- Alegbra, you?" Jake looked to the side, he knew his face was red he just didn't know why.
"Oh sick, me too," Devon smiled. "Wanna walk there together?" Jake already knew that Devon was in his class but I guess Devon never noticed him. Jake didn't know why but that made him feel sad. "Jake?" Devon's voice shook Jake out of his thoughts.
"Shit- sorry I zoned out" Jake apologized. Devon nodded. "Oh- yeah we can walk together" Jake said in a slightly anxious tone, smiling. Devon and Jake walked to Alegbra together, it wasn't very far away. "So why are you all of the sudden talking to me? Not in a mean way-"
"No offense, I just didn't notice you at first- sorry" Devon said awkardly.
"It's okay, in your defense, I look a lot different than I used to"
"Yeah, I like your hair," he smiled and mumbled "it's cute" Jake felt a weird feeling in his stomach, almost like a butterfly was fluttering around in there, but he decided to act like he didn't hear him and ignore the feeling.
"What did you say?" Jake said hoping Devon might say it again.
"Your hair- it's cool" Devon looked anxious.
"Oh," Jake was slightly disappointed. "Thanks" he smiled awkwardly. Jake then relised that they were standing in front of the classroom door for a long time and the bell rang. 'shit'
"Well, see you around?" Devon asked in a friendly tone. Jake smiled
"Yeah, see you later Devon" Devon waved and walked into the room, sitting down in a desk next to Junior. Jake took a deep breath in and walked into the class, sitting in the back corner. He let go of his breath he didn't know he was still holding and let his head collapse onto the desk. He turned his head, looking over at Devon. Jake was so happy that Devon finally talked to him, hopefully they can be friends. Or maybe more. But Jake didn't like boys, ever since he was little, his dad told him that liking boys was weird and unnatural. But Jake didn't think that. He saw two girls kissing and two boys kissing and it didn't bug him at all. 'I probably just wanna be best friends, but that's it"Jake must have been thinking for too long because half the class already zoomed by and Devon was in front of his face, waving his hand in front of his face.
"Jake? Hello? Are you okay?" He shook my head and blinked a few times
"Hi Devon" Jake was scared to look into his eyes.
"Devon why are you spending so much time with Mr. Faggy" Mr Faggy? That's a new one. That word still stung. Jake didn't quite understand how it was bad, he found out it means gay but why is it a bad word? It didn't make any sense to him.
"Just leave him alone Lexy, haven't you tortured him enough?"Lexy made a smug face and ignored Devon.
"What are you guys gonna do? Is Jake gonna kiss you? Huh freak? We all know you like him" Jake felt tears build in his eyes. He sucked them back up and just looked at Devon, his face was kinda red and he looked pissed.
"Fuck off Lexy" is all Jake could get out without crying. Lexy didn't leave. She laughed.
"Look at you! You are such a fucking pussy! What are you gonna do? Cry?" Jake felt anger start to stir inside of him. His fists clenched and he glared at Lexy.
"Shut the fuck up Lexy." Devon looked at him slightly scared but mostly worried. Lexy just kept going.
"Or what? You gonna take off my head and put it on your lame little statues?" She let out a evil chuckle. Jake stood up. He opened his mouth to say something but stopped himself. He glared at Lexy. "You can't even defend yourself," she laughed "You're fucking weak!" Jake had enough, his head went dark and his face went red. He tackled Lexy to the floor and swung his arm around, punching her square in the face. Jake couldn't hear anything around him or really see anything either. All he could think about is beating the shit out of Lexy. He punched her multiple times, she was screaming, Devon tried to grab him but Jake pushed him away. Lexy was crying. Her nose started bleeding and the teacher came back in.
"MR WHEELER" the teacher grabbed Jake and moved him over to the side. He was breathing heavily. He wasn't done with her yet. Devon looked terrified. Jake looked over at him and tears started to pour down his face. The world started spinning, he started panicking. Devon looked at Lexy, who was bleeding and crying, then he crawled over to Jake, who was balled up and shaking.
"Jake? Jake? Are you okay? Why did you do that?" Jake didn't awnser, he just cried harder. He was breathing so fast he couldn't think, all that went through his mind was bad things about his dad and how he was a failure. Devon put his hand on Jake's back and he flinched. "It's gonna be okay Jake" he whispered in his ear. "Jake, look at me please" Jake turned over slightly, looking at Devon
"I'm sorry.." is all he could get out. Devon hugged him, shushing him and telling him it was okay.
"Breathe with me Jake" Devon took a deep breath in and then out. Jake tried doing the same. Devon continued breathing like this until Jake was back to breathing normally. Jake wiped his eyes and looked into Devon's big brown ones. Jake relised what he did and he pushed himself away from Devon.
"I-I've got to go" he backed up to the door and ran out, panicking. He knows his dad is gonna be called at any moment. Jake was found by a teacher and he went to the principals office. 'I'm so fucked' is all he could think. After about 10 minutes of waiting in the office with Lexy, Lexy's dad and Jake's dad walked into the office. Jake's dad glared at him
"What the fuck. Did you do Jake?" Jake just looked at his feet.
"Mr Cross, Mr Wheeler, I brought you guys here because Jake and Lexy got in a fight."
"He needs to be sent to prison! Or sued! That monster freak destroyed my face!" Lexy complained. Jake just glared at her.
"Piss me off again and it will be your teeth" he muttered to himself.
"Jake! This is not how your mother and I raised you. I'm very disappointed." Jake knows he's screwed once they get home. Lexy cries.
"I'm afraid since in a way, it was self defense, he is suspended for 2 weeks" This pissed Lexy off.
"What? He should be EXPELLED."
"Sorry Ms. Cross that's not necessary, I do recommend that Jake goes into anger management though. Also Lexy, due to our no bullying policy, you are also suspended for 4 days." Mr. Cross looked furious.
"My daughter? Suspended? She's completely innocent!" The principal sighed.
"I'm sorry Mr. Cross, rules are rules."
"Let's go Jake." Lukas grabbed Jake's arm and dragged him out of the office and to the car.
"Jake. Why the hell would you do that?"
"She's been torturing me for years!" Jake yelled back.
"Do not. Raise your voice at me Jacob." Jake just huffed in response.
"Can we just go home?" He begged. Lukas turned on the truck and and drove to their house. When they got there, Jake grabbed his bag and stormed inside, dreading what was gonna happen next. He ran upstairs into his room and hid in his closet. Tears started pouring. He heard the door slam shut and his dad stomping over to the fridge. Jake squeezed his eyes shut. He was terrified. He hid his head on top of his knees and sobs into his jeans. Eventually he fell asleep gripping onto his legs. After sleeping for a bit he heard another loud thud but this one was glass shattering. He had a really bad feeling in his gut. His dad came storming up the stairs and yelling random cuss words. Jake clenched his eyes shut praying that his dad wouldn't find him. He felt like he was in a horror movie hoping the killer doesn't find him.
"JAKE WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU YOU FUCKING FAG" Jake cried silently and held his legs closer to him. He held his breath. His dad stomped around and walked into Jake's room. He tripped over the same pile of clothes that Jake did that morning but he didn't fall over. "You disappointment clean your god damn room you fucking queer" he took another sip of his gin and threw it against the wall. "Jake come out, give daddy a hug" he slurred all of his words. He stumbled around and bumped into Jake's bed frame. He looks over to Jakes closet and smirked. "Jake-fuck ow" he hit his elbow on Jake's desk. He grabbed Jakes closet's doorknob and turned it. Jake closed his eyes tighter hoping for all of this to be a dream. The door opened and Lukas laughed. This was not a dream. Jake moved his arms from around his legs to over his head to protect himself. His dad grabbed Jake by his curly hair and threw him onto the ground. He continued to kick him repeatedly in the stomach. Jake cried and screamed praying, begging for someone to help him. Help never came. Jake sat there, being beat for what felt like hours. After a while, Lukas grew bored and kicked Jake one more time than spat on him. "You better not be fucking gay, and don't ever. Hit a woman. Leave this room, you are dead." Jake waited for his dad to leave his room and once he left Jake let all his tears out. He was in so much pain, every body part felt broken. He wanted to get up but he could barely move. He cried on the floor for a bit before taking a deep breath and getting into a crawling position. Once that didn't hurt as bad, he got on his knees, then eventually to his feet. He limped to the bathroom, holding onto the wall. He got in there, shut the door, grabbed a razor, and collapsed to the floor. 'God I'm such a disappointment' one cut 'I can't believe I lost my temper and beat up Lexy' two 'Dad was right I'm just a filthy faggot' three 'Devon doesn't care about me, he just wants to get close to me so he can embarrass me in front of everyone' four. He dropped the razor and watched the blood drip down his arm. He grabbed a piece of toilet paper and wiped it off. He grabbed some bandages and wrapped them around his forearm before pulling down his sleeve and leaving the bathroom. Right as he was leaving he realized he left blood, his dad would beat his ass. Even more. He crawled back in and cleaned up the blood and grabbed the razor, putting it in his pocket. He crawled out of the bathroom and lifted himself up using the doorknob, he limped to his room and shut his door silently. He hopped over to his bed and fell face first onto his pillow. He cried a bit more into his pillow then grabbed his phone. He watched some tik toks before passing out due to exhaustion. A few hours later he woke up and looked at his clock, not that it matters what time it is anyway, he doesn't have school. It was 7:00 pm. His stomach was rumbling meaning he was probably hungry. That's most likely why he woke up. He got up, immediately falling back onto his bed due to be so sore. Jake knows he needs to eat yet his dad said he wasn't allowed downstairs. Maybe he passed out from being drunk. Jake decided to try to see. He stood up, still limping and now his arms being even more sore from the cuts. He went down a few stairs just til he could see the living room. He peaks down there and sees his dad passed out on the couch, holding a bottle of alcohol in his hand and the TV show "Cops" playing on the screen. Jake tip-toed to the kitchen and grabbed some bread, jelly,and peanut butter. Normally, pb and j sandwiches aren't dinner material but he didn't wanna use the microwave and wake up his dad. He made his sandwich, grabbed a mini bag of chips, a bottled water, and tip-toed back upstairs. He carefully shut his door and sat down on the floor, eating his food very slowly. After he finished eating, he chugged his water bottle and laid back down, his eye lids fluttering shut.

Jake was laying on a white bed. In a big blank room. All that was in it was a TV playing The Amazing World of Gumball and a few cameras. He tried moving his hands but he was in a straight jacket. He tried moving around more but it didn't work. He started to panic and trying get his arms out but nothing worked. He felt his eyes start to water up. He finally gave up and laid back down, watching the TV. A few seconds later a woman came in with a needle, she told Jake to relax and she stabbed the needle into his neck. He felt his neck tense up and his eyes droop. The lady was asking him questions yet he couldn't understand what she was saying. Jake saw people dying in front of his face, over, and over again. He tried moving again but now he was locked down fully. All he could see if the nurse stabbing him with a knife repeatedly in the chest. He couldn't feel any pain but he could feel himself dying slowly. He tried screaming but nothing came out.

Jake woke up again in a cold sweat. He wanted to scream and cry but he couldn't, he didn't want his dad to get mad. He looked at his phone, it was 4:45 am. He sighed and went to the bathroom to pee. When he left the bathroom, he thought he saw something standing behind him in the mirror but it ended up being a shadow of a plant. He breathed out and went back in his room. He fell back asleep hoping to not have another nightmare.

((Hey! This is finally the end of the chapter, if you even read this far- Sorry it was so edgy.. I hope you like it! I'll try to update tomorrow. Bye bye :)-M))
Also listen to the song it's so adorable))