Charles Poldark had died. The funeral was today and I had elected to stay at Nampara and not join. Demelza was teaching Jinny the ways of what to do.
"How's it you not be a the burying?" Jinny wondered as I stood by the window looking out.
"Because the gossip and scandalous nature of my marriage is still ripe and would over shadow it. That and I'm not ready to see any of them. My family and I have a strained relationship." I answer looking back at them from the window.
"Add more flour, like this, will make it less sticky." Demelza instructed. " See."
---------
I carried more wood into the yard and Ross noticed as he was coming around the corner at the same time. He sped over to me with an exasperated expression.
"What have I said. I do not require a wife to croquet and sip tea, but I do require her to remember her she's not a beast of burden." he took the wood from me adding it to the mountain of logs. He kissed me
"Ross, It's a few bits of wood." i sigh, placing my hands on his chest as he held my waist
"Are you happy my dear?" he asked gazing down at me.
"Yes." I answered with a small smile
"Then you shall be more happier when I tell you who's coming to stay." He grinned taking me back inside.
--------
Verity had arrived, now that her father was dead she was less restricted than she once had been, though as a woman she was still partial to what Francis had to say now.
"It was so kind of you to invite me my dear." she entered with a awkward smile. I curtsied to her.
"It's nice to see you Verity, would you care for some refreshment?" I ask gesturing to inside the parlour where it was all ready for her.
"Oh, no, please, let me take care of myself. The last thing I want is to give you any trouble." she replied looking back at her cousin, then to me again.
"You are no trouble at all, we've been looking forward to your visit. Haven't we Abigail?" he moved past us carrying her luggage
"Of course, Ross." the three of us enter the parlour, us two women clearly a little apprehensive. It wasn't like I didn't know Verity, in fact when I was younger and we occasionally interacted with one another. I really liked her, but that was many years ago and my refusal to attend anything of my old life apart from Geoffrey Charles is christening has left us with little knowledge of the women we have become. I know that she is or at least was in love with a navy man and well I was there for the fall out of that.
-----------
The three of us sat down to supper, I was still trying to figure out why I was so nervous and apprehensive about Verity's visit. I played with my food as Ross animatedly asked his cousin questions and she answered.
"It's a quiet house since Father died. Though Elizabeth plays the harp and speaks French to Geoffrey Charles and I have my needlework, Aunt Agatha her spinning." Verity answers as Demelza enters and pours us more wine. I give her a grateful look that even for a moment someone who I relate to now is here. Then she went back to the kitchen.
"And Francis?" Ross wondered, she paused for a moment
"Is often away." she replied. There was another moment of awkward silence before Verity filled it.
"This pie is delicious my dear, did you bake it myself." It was then I conveniently remembered.
"The Custard! I will go and see if it's set." I stood and went to the kitchen. Jinny, Prudie and Demelza were all at work. I sighed an lent against the table.
"What is it Abigail, does Mistress Verity upset you?" Demelza wondered
"No, not at all. In fact she is just as nice as I remembered. Its just.... I know it will sound silly but Elizabeth. She is... she is herself adored by everyone and I have always been second best to her. Verity here it just serves as a reminder that outside the little world I have created here she is out there where I will always be second best. Where it is because I am illegitimate or that my mother was black or that my father loved my mother more than heres, I feel even more than I did before at a disadvantage." I admit.
"But there is something that you have, that Elizabeth does not." she lifted my head up "You have Mr Ross and you have me and true friend who will always be by your side." she assured me
"Thank you."
-------
Verity and i sat sewing. I one of Ross' shirts that he managed to tear. The two of us sat in silence occasionally glancing at one another from time to time..
"You know Ross is very dear to me." I stopped to look up at her "What woman should ever deserve him I couldn't imagine. So when i heard he married you I was..." I cut her off
"Disappointed? Ashamed?" i assumed
"Relieved." my shoulders became less tense at her answer as confusion took over. "Before he met you again, he was broken, lost. So I was relieved to think he'd found someone to console him. To save him from his loneliness. but now I see it's more than consolation. You've given him hope. A life without hope is weak. And a life without love is..."
"It is not that...." I interrupt
"You do not love him?" she wondered
"I do, with all my heart but I have dared not to hope that he would ever, not when...not when there is my..." she seemed to understand "He has never used that word to me and I doubt he ever shall."
"It's life's greatest treasure to love. And be loved in return." she looked down think of her love. "My dear, I admire you, dare I say more than your sister."
"You do?" i question
"You are so brave, you address matters and people with such grace and spirit even though it will get the better of us. Do you think I give a jot where you came from, or who your mother is or how you went from a Lady to a barmaid, to a kitchen maid then mistress of Nampara. You have had the journey of a butterfly and that makes you more unique. For your journey alone you are a great Lady even without a husband." she declares
YOU ARE READING
Second Love
FanfictionI have found that 'Love' is a broad term and it usually depends on the person. For Example: I loved my Papa and my Papa love me yet I lost that love cause he died. I loved my sister, and I thought that she loved me, yet when It came to the rough of...
