Force Of Nature

Chapter 6

May

"Pregnant? Are you certain?" I asked the doctor in shock as she read over my lab results. No wonder I was feeling off, why I was late. I thought I was just working too hard. I had been so busy with the new merchandise project, as we had just gotten final approval to move forward. I had dismissed all of my symptoms, until I finally got a moment to slow down.

"One hundred percent. Based on my calculation, you are about six or seven weeks along."

Six I thought to myself. My mind flashed back to that night with Ryan. We had not used a condom, but I was on birth control. I guess it failed. We all know that nothing is one hundred percent effective. I should have been more careful. I was the one that initiated it. Ryan and I also never discussed that night. He knew my stance on it, and it was an unspoken agreement that we never speak of it and just go about with everything like we had been doing.

I knew that us sleeping together would cause complications. The morning after when he drove me home was every bit as awkward as I imagined. Although we didn't talk about it, there was an underlying tension that had not been there before. We pushed it aside and focused on work, and we got the work done, but I missed our easy conversation from the first week we had starting working together. This was all my fault. I had done it again. I had ruined a good working relationship because of sex. Will I ever learn?

"Judging by your reaction, I'm guessing this was not a planned pregnancy. If this is not something you are prepared to deal with, we can discuss your op..."

"No, no." I cut her off. "I'm keeping the baby."

Of that much, I was certain. I had always wanted children, but David had refused. The neurological disease that claimed his life was genetic, and he was adamant that he would not pass that gene down to his offspring, ensuring them a certain death sentence in their future. He was also opposed to adopting or using a sperm donor. His reasons being he did not want to leave a child fatherless and me to raise a child on my own.

I recalled my boss praising me, telling me that Ryan and I made an impressive team. Ha. That's not all we made. Suddenly, I began to laugh. The whole situation was so fucked up, there was nothing else to do because crying was not an option for me. I don't cry. Soon, my laughter became almost hysterical at that point, and then I realized my doctor was looking at me with a very strange expression.

"I'm sorry. I guess I was just a bit caught off guard, and just trying to process the news." I apologized, trying to explain my out of the ordinary reaction.

I could do this. I could raise a baby on my own. David had left me well off, and I was making a nice salary. But then it hit me...work. How was I going to explain to my job that I was pregnant when I clearly had no man in my life? But then again, they don't know the details of my personal life. I don't talk about my personal life with anyone. Well, except for Jules. As far as everyone else though, I could have a boyfriend back in Birmingham for all they know. Hell, maybe my biological clock was ticking and I decided to go the sperm donor route. But Ryan would know. Or at least get suspicious. He's a smart guy. He could do the math. Connect the dots...

"Tristyn? Tristyn..." I realized my doctor was speaking to me.

"I'm sorry." I apologized again.

She smiled at me. "It's fine. I know this is all unexpected for you. I'm sure it's a bit overwhelming as well."

She went on to talk to me about what to expect. Do's and don'ts for a healthy pregnancy, future appointments. Labs and an ultrasound were scheduled and I was given a prescription for prenatal vitamins as well as pamphlets on pregnancy. This was really happening. Holy shit. I was going to have a baby.