I didn't ask for this

53

3am

Woke up and Vinnies arms were around me, we had sex, meaningful sex, I felt loved, and like he really cares about me, but I understand now it didn't make me feel better, nor it changed the way I feel when I look at him now, or how I feel about myself. I thought that after this my feelings of whether I should try to move past what happen or not would be clear, but they aren't, in fact I think I might be even more confused now, which was obviously gonna happen, but I'm an asshole that's so deeply in love with someone that is not good for her.

I got changed back into my sweats and my hoodie and grabbed a paper and a pen from Vinnies desk, I sat on the bathrooms floor with my phones flashlight and wrote my feelings on a piece of paper

Vin

I wanna start off by saying thank you, even tho I shouldn't because there's not much to thank you for right now. You made me the happiest I've ever been to just destroy me completely without a warning, I'm not saying you wanted to, I wanna believe you didn't, I know you didn't, but For some twisted choice of life you did. I'm so confused and broken, my heart is drowning and I don't feel like myself anymore. I came to you so you would fuck me and make me realize that we belong together, but instead I ended up even more confused and sad, in desperate need to get out of your arms and run away of everything that you ever touched.
I want to forgive you and forget all about the past but I just can't, so I will listen to what you asked me and walk away, not because is the best for you, but because I need to.
I'll probably transfer to another school since the semester started not so long ago, but until then imma try to stay out of reach.
I love you, I'll forever love the boy that made me break all the rules and bend my morals just to feel him close, my epic love.
I want you to know I didn't ask for you, but I'm glad you stepped in my path. We need to heal, until then, and even if it was for the night, I'm just glad We slipped again.

HELLOOOOOO BABES, HOPE YOU LIKE THIS SHORT CHAPTER, ITS THE LAST ONE OF THIS BOOK

Do you want a second book or should we leave it at this? Your choice