If No One Else

ᶜʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ¹

1.  c o l d   m e t a l,  w a r m   h a n d s
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---------c h a n d l e r ---------

His body is hard plains of sweat-clad flesh and desire-filled moans as he pushes himself harshly inside me.

He touches every inch of me, inside and out, and I don't feel like just myself anymore.

I feel him everywhere, and for a second, he's my anchor to the world I so badly want to be released from.

He releases a deep groan as he pounds against my skin in a collision of needy flesh. Our inebriated brains focused on nothing but the feeling of ecstasy and unwavering closeness.

His body is warm and determined as he holds himself atop me; thrusting in and out as his hooded blue eyes bore into my own... grounding me.

And I moan, but not in a way that draws power from the euphoric lull of his hips, but because his flesh against mine makes me feel human again. It brings forth everything I try to hide on a daily basis, but it wasn't as scary when you had someone to take it on with.

That's what this is, a fleeting moment of companionship to face the travesties of my world.

"Oh, fuck!" He breathes out blissfully as his head sinks into the column of my neck and continues to push himself deeper into my core.

He hides his vivid blues away from me, and the heat of his body no longer melts away my once frozen internal boundaries.

I feel a flash of ice cover the extent of my flesh, and suddenly, I regret bringing the nameless boy upstairs as the lust-filled veil begins to lift from my eyes and I can see so clearly now.

He isn't my anchor. He isn't my saving grace. He's just a young, horny boy who's hard dick had picked me to be his answer to a release for tonight.

My eyes close shut as the realization dawns on me for the hundredth time; I didn't want this. Not in the same way I had thought I did twenty minutes ago.

My body tenses up as I mentally reject the idea of what's happening to me, while I feel the boy's body go stiff for a totally different reason.

I feel him shiver before he goes completely rigid as I feel his warm product coat my insides in a blazing trail of cream. He pumps inside of me a few more times before he stops the movement of his hips and just deeply breathes in the raw scent of me... of us.

And just as fast as the moment had come, it was now quickly leaving me. It was always like that: blissfully euphoric, then sourly bitter.

There was never an in-between moment, which
made me regret the rashness of my decisions when it came to giving people my body.

Why did I bring so many people up to my bed when I knew it'd end like this; cold and emotionless?

They always got their fill, while all I could feel was the aching in my chest as I wished for more than just lewd-fueled touches.

His lips press against my neck in a soft kiss before he finally lifted himself away from my lithe body, and replaces the space beside me with nothing but the shallow creak of the bed to further remind me that our brief carnal ruse had ended.

"God," he utters after a while of mere breathing being our only form of communication. "Did you...?" He briefly turns and questioned me with the light blue of his eyes, and for a second, I believe that he might care.