Of Witches And Wolves | M. Helvar ✐

03 | Their Throat

During their shared time spent in that disgusting cell, they hardly spoke. Especially after Matthias' admission of his... blasted fear of loving Rowan. They didn't understand any of it. Rowan tried to give Matthias as much kindness as they could muster, but it was getting tiring. Constantly having to remind him that Grisha weren't murderous.

That they weren't murderous. Rowan thought of Trassel, despite being raised to hunt Grisha down and go for the throat, he liked Rowan. That silly wolf would jump up for pets whenever he saw Rowan. The time spent with Matthias before... it was weirdly sweet.

Even if Matthias pretended to resent them, Rowan would see the smiles they knew he thought were hidden. Matthias' smile was like the moon. So bright and so often missed. They liked thinking about everything that reminded them of Matthias.

His eyes were like the rich sky-blue of the embroidery on the Tidemakers' keftas. Reddened cheeks like the cherries growing in the orchards on the Little Palace. Oh how much they missed home. A laugh so deep it felt like an earthquake whenever they stood close enough. And saints, his warmth. It felt like standing beside the sun.

Rowan didn't know if it was a Fjerdan thing or not. Either way, he was beautiful. Everything about Matthias just felt right. Even if Rowan was told to never trust a Fjerdan, they couldn't help it.

Fate wasn't something Rowan believed in but with the way everything has unfolded, it felt like fate was real enough as is.

Death should have claimed both their lives. Matthias should have died to that storm and those damned hunters and Rowan's back should have shattered when they fell from that building. None of it made any sense. How they'd escaped death only to be chained in a musty cinder block cell.

It dawned upon Rowan in that moment, one simple but stupid word that had escaped their mind until that moment. Irony. The whole stupid situation was painfully ironic. Death had managed to lose them but human-made chains held them in place. Once again, Rowan felt a laugh bubbling up in their throat.

"How is it that we have evaded Drüskelle and death herself alike... and yet humans have managed to chain us up no problem?" Rowan's throat was sore and scratchy. They rubbed the skill around their throat, they felt physical pain because of it. Strange.

"We are being punished," Matthias mumbled quietly. His voice was dejected and bored.

His lack of enthusiasm wasn't really appreciated, but Rowan knew neither of them would be in good spirits for a long time. Even his eyes looked downcast. The blue seemed leeched of its color. Rowan felt sad seeing how tired Matthias seemed.

Shoulders that once were held straight and high were coming in on himself and pulling toward the ground. He seemed to be crumbling in on himself.

"Funny you think that, Drüskelle."

Matthias looked up, eyebrows furrowed with what looked to be either confusion or anger. "Why call me that now? After all we have been through?" Something surged through his expression.

Rowan shrugged, "I can see it in your eyes, you're still filled with fury." Matthias' face remained unchanged as he watched them, eyes flitting to whatever movement they made. "You may be a traitor to your people but you are still Drüskelle through and through, I see that now."

There was hardly even a second before Matthias was jumping across the cell, red in the face, and grabbing for Rowan's throat.

"You know nothing of treachery!" Before his large hands could even touch their skin, they kicked him in the shoulder. Rowan had never seen Matthias react so harshly to something, the way he was tossed back made them worry. That's before the surprise in his face turned to resentment.

"Try that again and I'll make sure neither of us make it out of this cell alive, Helvar." The threat was empty for a moment before Rowan decided that Matthias might be mad enough to try to kill them.

His back thumped loudly from the way he threw himself against it, propping himself upright. Rowan saw how his shoulder hung awkwardly, well shit. They must have kicked harder than they thought. "You're lying, everything you've ever said is lies,"

"You're still such a child, Helvar."