'An Unusual Feeling. '

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Here I am again sitting in my bed, relaying the image of the blue eyed boy in my mind over and over, the more I tried to push the image out the more it came back, it was unusual, those sparkling blue eyes gave me a feeling of warmth which spread around my body like a wildfire, the pain in my stomache being replaced with a fluttering feeling, it confuses me but.. I know this feeling all too well.
I don't want to feel this again.
I hate how naive I am, I fall in love too easily, but maybe.. This time will be different?
No,they are all the same he's just going to break your heart.
The unusual warmth in my chest made me grip my shirt in frustration, I want this feeling to go away already.

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I decided to take the day off school and just stream.
It was comforting, streaming was one of my only ways out, it reminded me that there were people in the world who enjoyed my presence.
The image of the boy was always there, I don't know why I'm feeling like this I only saw him for an hour, I'm so naive.
I sighed, continuing to play Minecraft while making those witty jokes and dark humor, I felt like I could be myself while streaming, it was an amazing feeling.
I wish I could feel this free forever but everything comes to an end I guess.
I soon ended my stream sitting back in my chair, taking off my mask and glasses, I sighed, I leaned forward putting my head in my hands, wishing for the image to go away, this time the echoing of his voice replayed in my mind, giving me a feeling of peace, it was strange, if never felt this peaceful before, maybe this time us different, I sure hope so.

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I yawned, laying in my bed, I felt unusually happy, what did this strange blue-eyed boy do to me?
Im glad in a way, atleast the memories weren't there, this is an improvement to my sad life i guess.
I sat up again, suddenly feeling restless, with the need to do something, a rare occurrence may I add, so I decided to do some painting, it made me feel calm and cured my restlessness, which I was thankful for.
Today was a good day I'd say, well anything would be better than yesterday, maybe things were finally beggining to look up for me?

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I thought for a second and realised everyone had seen me in the hallway yesterday, that made me panic, nonono.. I don't want people to make fun of me, I'm so scared... I.. I wish I had just stayed in America.
It can't really be helped now I should just suck it up, that would be better for everybody, I complain way too much, just shut up ranboo,i regret naming my twitch after my real name, tommorow is going to suck.

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Before I knew it, it was the morning again, I sighed and got dressed in a hoodie jeans, trainers and my iconic cat socks.
I brushed my hair, although it still locked messy after, and grabbed my bag, walking out the door and locking it behind me, I walked to school at a slower pace this time, knowing what would happen when I walked through the gates.

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I sighed, going through the large metal gates and walking into the dull brick building, walking along the side quickly, aiming to get to first period as quickly as I could, people snickered at me once they saw me, it was frustrating and upsetting at the least, suddenly a fluffy haired brunette approached me as realisation struck me... its that boy.
He gave me a smile which made my chest tighten, I felt my cheeks heat up a little.
''Ello! ''He said as he looked up at me with those same sparkly blue eyes.
''Hello.. ''I said in a quiet voice, internally screaming at myself for being so shy.
''Why are people laughing at you?''The question sounded so innocent in his voice, but it saddended me slightly.
''I'm not sure, ''I said in the same quiet voice, again wanting my voice to atleast be a little louder.
''Ohh okay, I'm Toby, if you didn't know''He gave me another warm smile which made my world seem so much lighter.
''Uh, I'm ranboo.. ''I said, hoping he wouldn't know who I am, that would be too embarrassing for me.
Just as he was about to speak again, the bell rang loudly, I took the time to rush into my first period before I died from embarrassment.

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It was first period and I zoned out again, I knew all the stuff they were teaching anyways.
The bell rang symbolising it was period 2, this day is going to suck.
I walked to my second period immediately sitting down and zoning out, I was already taught this so I wouldn't have any trouble.
It was the end of period 2 in a flash, classes sucked they were so boring, it was free time now, I went out of my class only to want the ground to swallow me whole, I guess he was the same as everybody else.

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I saw the boy I had been thinking about non stop kissing a taller girl, they looked so happy together so I shouldn't complain but, my heart felt like it dropped and there was a sudden coldness in my chest, but I smiled, they looked so happy so I just walked past while tears threatened to spill from my eyes, I decided to jsut go home, I just needed a bit of time to myself, I mean who wouldn't be upset after, I wasn't over-reacting, right?
I felt so terrible for hating the poor girl without even knowing her but how couldn't I?
I wished my bed would just swallow me up so I wouldn't get my heart broken ever again.

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This started off kind of fluffy then it went 360, sorry, anyways say hi to Linda, aka Tubbo's 6'2 girlfriend,
On another note please go follow my friend Dailythingsidoforali,who is making this story with me, thank you and I'll see you in the next chapter ✨✨

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