Rainbow Christmas

Chapter 07. New Love

Finally, Paul and Jeremy fell asleep around midnight. This was not the first time Alan got sick. They are a lot better at handling this than the first time.

And when they woke up the next morning, Alan was back to being a happy baby again. But Paul still has stuff he needs to figure out. Should he act on his love for Owen? Or should he be a good father to Alan and stay with Jeremy?

He does not want to put Alan in that situation where his fathers were divorced before he could remember they were married.

Jeremy brings Paul his breakfast and coffee. He set up the small desk in their bedroom to be their breakfast table for today. Because they are both exhausted and just want to stay in.

This feels normal somehow. But Jeremy knew that his mistake was still unforgivable. He knew Paul had slept with Owen before. It happened when Jeremy threw Paul out. But he completely betrayed Paul's trust by cheating on him.

"This feels normal, right?" Paul chuckled. "But not really?" Jeremy forced a chuckle too. "How was your date last night?" Jeremy suddenly felt his heart aching.

"It's Owen. You know how I feel about him." Paul avoided eye contact with Jeremy. "You love him. I know, you told me." Jeremy sighed. He wished he was as strong as Paul. Paul fell in love with another man, yet he managed to stay faithful. "Do you still love me?" Jeremy asked.

"I don't know. Please don't make this more difficult than it already is. You know what I want.." Paul sighed. "I want you to have full custody of Alan.." Jeremy tried to hold himself together.

"No.." Paul answered, Jeremy really put him in a hard spot. But he doesn't want to be Alan's father if they really are getting a divorce. "He hates me, you know.." Jeremy pursed his lips.

"He is your child, legally." Paul now played with his food because his appetite was gone. "You want me to move out?" Jeremy asked again. "Yeah.. you can't afford the rent on that place." Paul said.

"Can I still work for you? Part time? I need.. Alan needs the money.." Jeremy's tears started to flood out. Paul sighed. He should not punish Alan for Jeremy's mistakes. "Yeah, sure. And I will give him child support. But I am not giving you spousal support."

"Paul.. what can I do to fix this?" Jeremy cried. "Just.. please sign the divorce papers." Paul stood up and walked away.

He walked towards the inn to see Owen, and he saw Mia with a man halfway towards the inn. So he approached Mia. He was shocked to see who the man was. "Scott?" Paul said.

"Paul!" Scott jumped up and hugged Paul right away. "How are you doing? I have been trying to find you since yesterday!" Scott chuckled. "I have been busy.." Paul smiled.

"Paul is dating a hot guy.." Mia nudges Paul. "No, I am with my.." Paul stopped."Never mind.." "Ex-husband?" Scott smiled. "I met him yesterday. And I told him about us.." Scott chuckled.

"He's still technically my husband, but we're separated now." Paul forced a smile. "I need to go. Catched up soon?" Paul asked. "Well, nice to see you again, Paul.." Scott hugged Paul again.

Paul walked away after that. He just wants to be with Owen. He knocked on the door of Owen's room as he arrived. Owen opened the door and smiled. He let Paul in.

"How's Alan?" Owen asked as they settled in the bed. "He is fine for now." Paul smiled. "Owen, I'm sorry about last night.." "You don't need to say sorry.." Owen chuckled.

"Christmas is still four days away. Do you want to go somewhere with me? I just don't want to be stuck here with Jeremy. At least not now.." Paul sighed. "Yeah, sure.." Owen put his head on Paul's shoulder.

"George, I have a camper van. We can go south and see Lake Winnebago if you want?" Paul asked. "As long as it's less awkward than last night, I am in." Owen laughed.

"I saw Mia hugged you last night.. She is a nice girl, and she is my lovely sister. You can date her, just so you know.." Paul smiled. "So it is easier for you to drag yourself back to Jeremy?" Owen asked.

"I told Jeremy about how I fell in love with you when I begged him to take me back. He could have told me that he wanted to be intimate with someone else instead of secretly having an affair." Paul shook his head slowly. He closed his eyes to dampen the pain. "I just don't get it.."

"He decided to lie. It's not your job to understand why." Owen held Paul in his arms. "We have been together for so long.." Paul said with a broken voice.

Owen took a deep breath. "And I have been in love with you for half of those years. How do you think I feel?" Owen did not mean to hurt Paul's feelings, but he really thought that it would be a stupid move if Paul got back together with someone that hurt him just because they were together for a long time or because they just had a baby together.

Paul opened his mouth, but nothing came out. He tilted his head and stared at Owen. He never knew that he had hurt Owen all these years. He finally collected himself to put his apology into words. "I'm sorry.."

"That's not.." Owen holds his breath and bites his puckered lips. "I should not say that. It's not your fault, so you shouldn't feel sorry. People fall in love randomly. And I was the one that decided that I was not going to tell you about my feelings." Owen forced a smile.

"Owen, I want to date you. For real..." Paul finally made his decision. "Can I kiss you?" Owen asked. Paul nodded. Their kiss today is longer and more passionate than the one from yesterday. And it leads to something more than a kiss after that.

Back in the main house...

Mia took Scott to the main house. Unfortunately, they bumped into Jeremy again. This time he carried Alan with him, and asked the same question: where is Paul? Mia just pushed Scott away so she could go too. But, Jeremy grabbed her arm.

"Look, I made a mistake. But your brother has been in love with someone else for two years. Do you ever think how that affects me? You and Paul can blame me, but Paul is not as innocent as he looked!" Jeremy's anger finally exploded.

"Did he cheat on you?" Mia asked. "No.. not physically. But that doesn't mean that he didn't cheat emotionally!" Jeremy said. He made Alan fuzzy because of his anger. He swung Alan gently to calm him down.

"So, you were saying that my brother has better self-control not to hurt you while you don't? That is such an obvious reason why you know exactly why we blame you." Mia shoved Jeremy away. She dragged Scott away from Jeremy's drama.

Jeremy ended up sitting on the bench outside with Alan. Mia was right; Paul is a better man. Jeremy should have told Paul the truth and kept himself from ruining his only good thing in life.Paul is amazing and loving.

Jeremy can't even imagine how painful it was for Paul to shove his feelings for Alan away for two years. Paul took care of him even when he barely had anything. Paul caved in to his wish to have a kid.

As Jeremy headed back, he saw Paul looking so happy. He knew Paul just had an intimate time with Owen because that was his expression after being intimate with him for the last eight years.

"Paul!" Jeremy called. He made Alan wave at Paul too. Paul approached them. "Yeah?" Jeremy looked down. "I want to fix this.." Paul stood without saying a word.

"I know you just made love with Owen. And.. you have your rights to do so. But I want to fix us. For Alan's sake." Jeremy pursed his lips.

"I can't. I'm sorry. You could have come clean to me. But you never did. For two years, I buried my feelings towards Owen for you." Paul sighed.

"Now, I just want to be with Owen, whether you like it or not.." Paul smiled bitterly. "If you still love me, you should give me a chance to do this. Let me be happy again.." Paul kissed Alan's cheek and walked away.