Late Night Sessions | JJK X OC X MYG ✔️

8. A Date?!

Cassie's 1st Person POV

It's been a little over a month since the last time I saw Ian. It was the night he was on my doorstep and I told him to leave without hearing him out. The whole week after that he would try to call a couple times and texted incessantly that I eventually blocked him.

Sounds harsh. But, not when you consider the fact that he admitted to seeing someone else while he was with me.

Tara said her boyfriend, turned fiancée , who became friends with Ian while I was with him, showed her a picture Ian posted of himself in Chicago. I no longer follow him on any social media accounts because I have no interest in seeing him or being aware of what he's up to. So, Tara's little bit of news informed me that he's in a completely different state and I can really move on. It's good we aren't in the same city anymore.

Part of me feels like I'll honestly die without ever finding the right man. Being in so many failed relationships is just beyond discouraging.

I am a catch. I have a job I love and I feel like I'm constantly gaining more experience and moving upwards in my profession. I can afford to live in my own place that I chose to share with Penelope because neither of us like the idea of living alone. I can very well afford a small apartment fit for me, but it's a lot more fun living with my best gal. I know what I want in life. I don't like to toot my own horn, but I think I'm pretty bad ass. So, why am I attracting the wrong guys?!

It's hard to stay positive when I feel like I'm constantly being screwed over in relationships. I can easily get myself sad just thinking about never finding the right partner.

Ever since that last time I saw Ian and cried my eyes out to Jeongguk, Jeongguk has been there for me. Besides Jin and Penelope, I'm so used to crying on his shoulder and I just feel comfortable around him. Jin has been out of the country for vacation this past week and Penelope has been really hot and heavy with Jay. So, Jeongguk has been stepping it up and being present, even when I tell him he doesn't need to be burdened with my sad girl presence. But, he insists on being there for me.

I never feel like I am being judged by him so I always feel like I can open up to him, and vice versa. It's always been like that between us.

The first week after seeing Ian that night, Jeongguk would bring me food and make sure I would eat because he knows I don't have as much of an appetite when I'm down. He'd hang out and watch movies with me during the little time he has off. And, over the past couple weekends, we've fit in going to the bowling alley and playing miniature golf.

Jeongguk knows how to cheer me up, take my mind off things that gets me down or offer me his perspective as well as advice.

Sometimes I can't help but wish we were more, but he's my best friend, and what we have means so much. If by some miracle he actually has feelings for me the way I feel for him- then what would happen if we got together and it ends the same way as all my past relationships?

I don't think I can risk my valuable and meaningful friendship with Jeongguk.

I've been sitting in my kitchen, just letting my mind wander with all these thoughts. I've also been slowly eating my roast beef sandwich I picked up at a deli near the condo. Zooey is sitting right next to my chair hoping to get fallen scraps of my sandwich.