Branded For Ruin

Part 10

The shower had calmed your nerves a bit. You pulled one of Bucky's grey T shirts over your head and tugged on a pair of his sweatpants. They were a bit big on you, but whatever. You found Bucky opening a bag of Starbursts in the kitchen, and he seemed to be struggling to open the pink one in his hand. Alpine watched his owner fight with the tiny wrapper.

"Need a little help there?"

He jumped slightly at your sudden question, then smiled. "Yes, please."

He handed you the Starburst and you opened it with ease. Bucky thanked you before popping the candy in his mouth. You guys stood there in silence until you picked up an orange one.

"You, uh, you ever roasted these before?"

Bucky rose an eyebrow at your question. "Roasted?"

You shrugged and fiddled with the candy in your hand. "Yeah. It's really good."

"Okay. Wait right here." Bucky said before going out the door.

You waited in the kitchen for a few minutes before he came in with an arm full of wood. He walked over to the wood burning stove, and you watched as he built a quick fire. After he got the fire started, he opened the cupboard behind you and pulled out two roasting forks/sticks out. He handed one to you and grinned.

"Show me how it's done." He was practically beaming.

You nodded and unwrapped a few Starbursts for you and Bucky. "Okay, so put one on each side, and make sure they're on well, they tend to fall off easily. Then stick it in the fire and wait till they're both bubbling, almost dripping. Like so."

You stuck your stick into the fire and you both watched as the candy started to bubble. You pulled the stick out and smiled. "They cool down within a few seconds. The outside hardens fast, but the inside is warm and gooey making it taste delicious." You popped one in your mouth and closed your eyes at the sensation. "Now you try."

Bucky stuck his stick in the fire. The soft glow of the flames made Bucky look ethereal in a way. The usual wrinkles on his face were relaxed and he was wearing a content smile. You wondered how many people got to see this side of him, the soft content Bucky. You also wondered how often he was able to be this way. Once his Starbursts started to bubble, he pulled his stick out, a childish smile now on his lips. After a few seconds he pulled one off the stick, eyeing it carefully before dropping it in his mouth. He couldn't stop the gentle moan that escaped as the flavor burst in his mouth. He quickly ate the other one and looked at you.

"Definitely my new favorite food now." Bucky said grabbing another candy from the bag.

"Starbursts aren't food." You said plucking the candy from his hand, unwrapping it for him when you saw him struggling again.

"It is now." He grinned. "And whenever I see a Starburst, I will think of you. I-I mean, this moment or whatever."

Red blossomed on his cheeks, and he turned toward the fire. You found that man utterly adorable. You nudged his shoulder and stuck another Starburst on your stick.

"I'll think of you, too."

Bucky's blue eyes stared at yours and you saw his eyes momentarily flicker toward your lips. You both leaned closer to each other slowly, your lips were about to connect before Bucky pulled back and stood up.

"I'm sorry. I-I shouldn't—You belong with someone better than me. I don't know what I've been thinking. I've done so many bad things, horrible things, a-and I don't deserve you." Bucky was pulling at his hair nervously, eyes trained on the dancing flames. "I'm...I'm just branded for ruin, okay?" He whispered the last part, and his eyes were glazed with water.

Barely two seconds passed before you had tackled Bucky in a hug. He stumbled back from the force but steadied himself and hugged you back. Your arms tightened around him, and you buried your face in his chest. You stayed like that for a while, basking in each other's embrace.

"Bucky," It came out quiet. "You've made me feel something more than fear and anxiety. And honestly, I never thought I'd be able to care about someone again. Like really care, but then you came along, and the feelings in my chest didn't hurt like they usually did. I know we don't know each other that well, but at least give us a chance. Give you a chance."

Bucky kissed the top of your head and sighed. "It's worth a shot."

~~~~~~

"Are you sure about this? Really, I can sleep on the couch." Bucky said as you slipped under the covers of one side of the bed.

"Come on, we're both adults. Nothing funny, just for sleep. Promise."

Bucky still looked nervous but slipped into the other side of the bed. You turned off the lamp beside you, and Bucky gasped as the room plunged into darkness. You turned back on the light and looked at Bucky.

"Everything alright?"

Bucky sat up and nodded. "Yeah, it's just that, I usually have some sort of light on at night. I hate the dark. It's okay, though, I'm sure I can make it for one night..."

You jumped out of bed and walked toward the closet on the other side of the room. You turned on the small light in there and left the door cracked so some light entered the room. You crawled back into bed and turned off the lamp beside you.

"See? Perfect." You said as you saw Bucky visibly relax.

"Um, one other thing. I...I usually sleep with my arm off, but if that scares you, I can leave it on." Bucky added quickly.

You touched Bucky's right shoulder tenderly. "I'm not scared, promise. Do what makes you comfortable."

Bucky nodded and he took off his arm, setting it on the dresser. You both had your backs to each other and after about ten minutes you sighed.

"Bucky?"

"Hm."

"Can we hold each other? Well, what I mean is, I usually sleep with a body pillow and I—"

Before you could finish your sentence, Bucky had rolled you into him, his arm wrapped snugly against you. His chin rested atop your head and your face was nuzzled into the crook of his neck. You wrapped your arms around him and sighed in contentment.

"Better?" Bucky whispered.

"Much." You whispered back.

The soft thumping of Bucky's heart lulled you into a peaceful sleep. Bucky's right hand traced small patterns on your back as he reveled in your warmth. He could get used to this, that's for sure. And for the first time in a long time, when he closed his eyes, the shadows of his past didn't haunt him. Instead, he dreamed of roasted Starbursts and cuddles.