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𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐈𝐕𝐄 || 𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘞𝘢𝘴 𝘈𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘖𝘯𝘦
UPON WAKING UP, JAXON BLINKED A FEW TIMES, HANDS CLENCHED DOWN BY HIS SIDES. It took him a moment to quickly recognize his surroundings, but when he did, his body relaxed as he glanced around from his spot on the couch. Everything stood still, only able to hear his own lung inhaling oxygen and puffing it back out. And the cold that surrounded him told him enough that Natasha wasn't gone. If that hadn't been enough, the small coffee table holding a paper solidified the feeling.
I got called into work. I'll be back later tonight. See you soon - Nat <3
It was only barely noticeable, but a smile tugged at Jaxon's lips as he placed the paper down and sighed. Leaning back into the couch with his eyes flickering around the apartment. So much time, so few options to dabble in. The afternoon sun was setting, having slept practically all day after two days of searching and fighting his way to Natasha. Which left him energized, wondering what he would do with himself now.
His mind found itself back to the dream he'd seen, or memory. It must've been the memory of what Natasha had told him about him leaving and pushing her away. After all, the pieces connected rather correctly. It didn't say much, but it told him enough of what had happened the last time she saw him and the last time he saw her.
He searched deeper, focusing on the smaller details of the vision, hoping to find something that would open further memories locked away from him. But the longer he stayed thinking about that memory, the more he saw the pain and fear in Natasha's eyes. How she flinched and felt smaller under his rageful gaze. It hurt him knowing that he could strike those types of feelings in her.
Even as he sat here, enough knowledge to understand what he was before in small pieces, the man he was seemed foreign. Almost an entire ghost of who he was now. Then again, the possibility of reverting to that same person was still possible. Just with the addition of these new memories, he's spent without his past in his mind. But one thing he was sure of was the fact that he never wanted to put Natasha in that same position. This could be considered a new start for him, to shape himself into the person he wanted to become. Anything was possible.
After a while of sitting around, unsure of what to do, Jaxon had resorted to TV. Retreating to some entertainment to fill the silence around him and the memory screaming in his mind. Putting on Peaky Blinders, letting it play in the background as he had walked down the hall to Natasha's bedroom.