Kirby Headcanons

| 38 - Criminal Charges |

King Dedede: mostly labor law violations, such as making people work for long periods of time without any breaks, underpaying his workers (or not paying them at all), child labor, etc. Has also been accused of violating civil rights.

Meta Knight: several homicides, breaking and entering, stalking, insurance fraud (don't have to pay taxes on your ship when it's at the bottom of the ocean, plus the insurance payout was probably pretty good), attempting to overthrow the government, a couple war crimes, and failing to adhere his ship to Dreamland's government safety regulations.

Magolor: repeated tax fraud and tax evasion, attempting to take over the universe, reckless driving, and also failing to adhere his ship to any government regulations (Halcandran, Dreamland and intergalactic).

Marx: attempting to overthrow the government and endangering the entire planet. Just Marx things :)

Captain Vul: a singular DUI from 20 years ago, plus multiple manslaughter charges. And don't forget the tax evasion!

Mace Knight: he accidentally violated the Geneva convention one time. Accidentally :)

Axe Knight: 4 DUIs, reckless driving, 2 counts of arson, first degree murder, breaking and entering, robbery, countless assault and battery charges, and reckless endangerment.

Trident Knight: several counts of arson, assault and battery, multiple robberies, domestic terrorism, breaking and entering, kidnapping, 2 burglaries, and 1 attempted homicide.

Bandana Dee: littering (it was a juice box. He feels terrible about it).

Blade Knight: threatening children.

Susie: terrorism, kidnapping, invading another country and attempting to forcefully take control of it, just the usual things a secretary does :)

Galacta Knight: holding the world record for amount of homicides. He's also threatened minors, threatened adults, sent countless death threats to people (a lot of which he's actually followed through on), and has stolen thousands of dollars from people by forcing them to hand over their wallets.

Taranza: kidnapping, endangering the king. He's a pretty nice guy besides that though :)

Dyna Blade: domestic terrorism.

Tuff: graffiti, vandalism, and reckless endangerment probably (wait but isn't he a child—)

Good boys and girls who have done nothing wrong in the eyes of the law:

-Kirby (debatable though, honestly. He's done tons of property damage, for starters)

-Sword Knight (being kind of rude isn't a crime, so)

-Javelin Knight (he actually skipped jury duty before, but that court hearing wound up being canceled so no one ever went after him for it)

-Sailor Dee (while his involvement in Meta Knight's attempt to take over Dreamland is questionable, he didn't directly do anything wrong)

-Adeline

-Ribbon

-Coo, Rick, Kine and whoever the fourth one was (I'm sorry)

-Lololo and Lalala

-Kracko + Kracko Jr. (in their defense, they just follow Dedede's orders)

-Tiff

-Escargoon (again, he only follows Dedede's orders)

-anyone else I forgot to put on this list, probably

Just about everyone here can also be charged with endangering a minor (they've pretty much all fought Kirby at one point or another; y'know, a child, getting stabbed, slashed, squished, smacked, and blasted with cannons).

So who do you guys think is the worst haha

I'm personally going with Meta Knight, seeing as he's not only got a bunch of serious charges himself, but two of the knights under his command have also racked up a bunch. Galacta's definitely up there too, though.