Not A Dream | An Omori Fanfiction

11- Countless Apologies

Basil's P.O.V

The way Sunny said that felt so final, as though it really couldn't ever be ok again. I didn't at all like that thought... if there was anything I would deny, it was that things weren't ok.

Face the sun, find the positive... just like a sunflower...

"I know but... I promise it'll get better..!" I insisted. Sunny didn't say anything, just slowly steadied his breath and eventually sat up. He kept his hand intertwined with mine and I suddenly felt my face heat up. I silently prayed he wouldn't notice the blush that had settled on my face.

Sunny remained silent, absently staring at the floor. He swung his legs slightly.

About thirty minutes passed like that. Both of us were completely silent and still holding hands. Holding Sunny's hand eased my own nervous thoughts. My mind was finally accepting what had really happened to Mari and it had been all I could think about. My own actions from then terrified me... hanging Mari's corpse, even if it had been to keep Sunny safe.

That alongside the thoughts of how life would be once we were released from the hospital, now that everyone knew the truth.

"Basil you don't have to stay up for me, you can sleep if you want." Sunny finally said. I shook my head, "I wanna stay up. I'm not that tired anyway."

Sunny gave me a look, "... Basil, I can see those bags under your eyes, you know that right...?"

"Well you have them too!" I shot back. "Fair, but I'm not denying that I'm tired. I just don't want to go back to sleep if it means more nightmares..." Sunny replied.

I understood that feeling. I often avoided sleep to avoid the nightmares that plagued me.

But it only made me more miserable than I already was...

"I get that, but... aren't we supposed to be facing our fears now?" I asked. Sunny thought that over, "Well... yes... I want to do that... but if it wasn't obvious I'm not very good at that." He smiled shyly at that last sentence.

"And you think I'm good at it?" Basil asked, laughing bitterly, "Sunny, I did the same exact thing, avoiding sleep and all, but look what else I did! Your eye is gone because I believed the stupid hallucination that I made up, for the soul purpose of not facing my fears, was real..."

"Well I spent four years just sitting inside, slowly allowing myself to literally forget what I'd done to Mari while you all suffered. If Kel hadn't knocked on my door that day, I never would've gone outside to see you all again before moving away."

"Well-" I started to say before cutting myself off, "No... this... let's not talk about this... comparing our mistakes is just going to make us both sad..." Sunny sighed and nodded, "Yeah..."

I already felt tears welling up in my eyes, just looking over at Sunny and seeing what I'd done to his eye.

"Hey..." Sunny said, noticing my tears even in the dim light. He pulled me close and rubbed my back in small circles. The tears streamed down my face as I awkwardly buried my face into his shoulder. Given the bruises on my face it was a bit uncomfortable, but Sunny's arms around me made me feel a bit better.

"I'm s-sorry Sunny..." I stammered. "You don't have to apologize Basil... if anything, I should apologize..." I further buried my face into Sunny's shoulder, ignoring the pain in my face. "P-Please don't apologize... it's my fault..." I whimpered, more tears falling down my face.

"No it's not and... I didn't mean to upset you more Bas... I-I'm sorry..." Sunny muttered, "I'm... not much good at comforting people anymore... I guess I never was but... I'm trying..."

"I-I know..." I replied, "Th-That's enough for me..." Sunny pulled me closer, gently running his fingers through my hair. We stayed like that until I calmed down. My face was warm, soaked from my tears and throbbing from all the bruises, but I did feel better.

"Better...?" Sunny asked. I nodded, "Thank you Sunny..." Sunny smiled and nodded.

"God how did this turn into you comforting me, I didn't have the nightmare." I said, laughing a little. Sunny laughed as well, "Don't worry, this helped me too."

"Heh, I'm glad! But... what exactly was your nightmare?"

"Oh... um..." Sunny shifted, "It's kind of a long story... but a certain entity, one who reminded me of what really happened to Mari... he told me I'm not done facing something... I don't know what... and that's probably what scares me..."

"Oh... well... we've got time to try and figure it out, right? I definitely don't think I've faced everything either..." I sighed. Sunny looked over at me, "Like what?"

"Sunny I'm not gonna dive into all that right now... it's a lot and you have enough on your mind as it is... I promise to tell you later, but right now it's... too much for you to know and too much for me to pour out..." I replied.

Sunny's expression changed to concern.

Understandable... given what I just said... but four years of problems to face that I've been trying to ignore and pretend aren't there is too much to unpack right now... for both of us... I promise it'll make sense when we get there...

"Hey, don't worry. I'm gonna be fine. It's just... a lot to face head on."

"Yeah, no, I get that, all this is a lot for me too... I'm just... I'm worried I hurt you in ways that I can't repair..."

"Not all at once, you definitely can't, but some wounds take longer to heal." I said. Sunny thought about that for a moment before a small smile spread across his face, "I like that way of thinking about it... we'll heal them together, ok?"

I nodded, a smile spreading across my own face. "Ok."

"Alright, all that said, let's try to get some more sleep. We're gonna have quite a bit ahead of us." Sunny said, laying back down. I nodded and laid down beside him, closing my eyes and almost immediately falling into sleep.