The Bad Boy OR The Best Friend

Evan

EVAN SMITH

Chaos.

If I could describe the state of my mind and heart in one word, this would be it. I know another word that would help anyone understand how I feel right now – miserable. But somehow, I am extremely calm on the outside, which again brings me back to how chaotic my entire body feels. It's a state of mind I have not felt familiar with in a long time, unless I am in her presence.

"Uncle Ev!"

I look down at the little girl tugging at my pants, with one end of the ribbon of her dress in her mouth. She seems to be chewing on it like a candy and I smile at the sight.

"Yes, honey?" I kneel down to her height, as much as my body allows because she's just a four-year-old. I tug away the ribbon from her mouth and she passes me a sheepish smile.

"Dada." She points in a certain direction and I follow her finger, only for it to land on my brother, who's already staring at me, a little pissed.

"He's a little dramatic, isn't he?" I poke her nose and she giggles, nodding.

Sawyer makes his way to us and I stand up straight to match his height. It's clear from his face that he's about to break into a lecture.

"Save it." I mutter through gritted teeth, my voice low because I don't want to distress my niece.

Thankfully, Jordan joins us just that moment. But the look he shoots my way, I immediately regret my gratitude. He's about to open his mouth when Penny tugs on his pants just like she did with me a minute ago.

"Yes, sweets?" He looks down at his daughter.

"Can I go play?" She looks up through her honey-doe eyes.

"Stay with Matt, okay?" He tells her and she nods before running off. As soon as Penny leaves, he turns to me. "What the fuck?"

His voice is slightly high, making me flinch because my head is throbbing, "Don't shout."

"Good, he has a hangover. He deserves it." He snaps at Sawyer, somehow holding him responsible for my actions. "Get yourself together, Evan."

To be honest, I'm annoyed as hell with everyone ordering me around since the moment I opened my eyes this morning. Normally, I would just shake my head at Jordan and walk away, but my sour mood gets the best of me.

"Or else what?"

He looks disappointed, both him and Sawyer. "Trust me, you would regret ruining her day. It's not about you, man!"

His words touch the wound that's too fresh, too delicate for a taste of salt he just sprinkled on it. I try not to physically flinch from his words. But the way Sawyer is looking at me, I know I grimaced instinctively.

Jordan leaves me alone with my brother. Suddenly, I am given the pity look which only annoys me further. I want to find the bar because that's the only thing that can help me right now but Jordan's words have left an impact — just like he wished it would.

"Evan!" I hear Paula's panicked voice. She comes to stand in front of me and smacks my shoulder. "Where the hell have you been?"

"Ow, woman!" I wince. "Easy!"

"No, if anything, I should've slapped you on the face. You had everyone worried. What kind of a man of honour are you if you missed the rehearsal dinner?"

A chaotic miserable one, if I have to answer honestly. But I just offer her an apologetic smile.

"The team held me back for some last-minute meeting, I couldn't make it back in time." I shrug, and Sawyer just shoots me a look at how smoothly I just lied.