Obey Me! ONESHOTS

𝐌𝐚𝐦𝐦𝐨𝐧 - 𝑺𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝑪𝒂𝒏'𝒕 𝑩𝒖𝒚 - 𝐆𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐝

Mammon x Tsundere(??) Reader (Fluff, a crumb of angst near the end)
(Not in relationship)

Mammon grinned that bastardly grin of his. "Hey, sweetcheeks, I just got a gold credit card - 50,000 Grimm is on it!"

"I told you to stop calling me that," You huffed.

"C'mon, lemme take my pretty human some place pretty!" He whined.

You sighed. "Why me?"

"Nobody else will go with me... Plus, we made a pact! That has to mean something, right?"

"It means get out of my face," You replied.

"Gimme two hours!" He exclaimed.

"What?"

"Two hours to make everything perfect, just for you! I'll spend all of my money on it; c'mon, I'm beggin' ya!"

You sympathized for him. What were you even going to do for two hours, anyway? You sighed, reluctantly agreeing with the promise he had just made.

Fifteen minutes later, he took your hand. "C'mon, Y/n! It's time to go!"
He dragged you by your hand to his car. He held the door open as he climbed in. It was nice, but he was still a nuisance to you.

"Alright, first, we're goin' shopping! Anything ya want, okay?" He said, driving his convertible downtown.

"I'm not gonna waste your money, Mammon," You mumbled.

"If you're usin' it, it's not bein' wasted!" He replied.

"Mammon, seriously. I don't wanna give you anything to hold over my head," You explained.

He looked at you. "Ya think I'm gonna blackmail you in order to date me?"
The car slowed to a stop.
"I may be petty sometimes, but I'm not evil. Plus, I'd never do that to ya. If we're gonna date, it'll be true love or nothin'!"
He accelerated quickly again. Soon enough, you saw the shopping district.
He parked his car and opened the door for you.

You briefly thanked him and walked into the store. 'Wow.' It was seriously fancy. The entire store was sumptuous; everywhere you looked sparkled with gold or diamonds or something beautiful.

Mammon started with a ring store. Honestly, you weren't interested in rings and didn't plan on getting married any time soon, so you exited that store rather quickly.

Next, an electronics store. You were surprised by all of the newest phones, but you really loved your phone. Mammon bought two matching watches and you put one on. It was a bit big, considering that they were made in devil sizes, but it was cute.

Next, a clothing store. Mammon giggled like a kid as he led you to the underwear section. "Wanna pick some out?"
You punched him in the arm playfully while walking away. But a sky blue hoodie caught your eye - it was super stylish with a little sheep on it!
You grinned and tried it on, showing it off to Mammon. He grinned, "Wow, it looks perfect on you! Wanna get it?"

You smiled. It was so soft!! "Yeah!"

You looked around the store. There were cute fluffy socks - everyone loves fluffy socks. You asked Mammon if you could get those too, and he nodded, adding that you should get matching socks. He also got new sunglasses.

Mammon guided you to a chain of restaurants. You both got massive amounts of food and slurped it all up in less than half an hour. Beel could probably eat it all and ask for seconds in five minutes. You chuckled at the thought.

"Hm? You havin' so much fun you're laughing?" He asked.

"No, I was thinking about Beel." You explained.

"Beel? But I'm right here! C'mon, this is our date, not Beel's!" He whined.

You stayed silent. 'This wasn't really a date, was it?'

After you were done with your food, Mammon took you to a car shop. "As much as I love drivin' ya everywhere, I think you should get your own ca-"

"Mammon!" You nearly shouted, "You can't buy me a car!"

He frowned. "Why not?"

"Why are you doing this?!"

"Doin' what?"

"Buying everything for me! Clothes, food, a fucking car! Why?!" You yelled.

"I just," He frowned, dejectected, "I just want you to like... or love... me."

You sighed.
"Mammon," You whispered, "There are some thing you just can't buy. Do you understand?"

"But you'll like me more if I-"

"No. I won't."

"But you had so much fun at the clothing store! And you got stuff!" He explained.

"We were making memories, Mammon. That doesn't mean I'm in love with you. I was just having a good time with you."

He sighed in defeat. "Why can't you just love me, Y/n?"

"You can't buy love with money, Mammon. You said it yourself - 'If we're gonna date, it's gonna be true love or nothin'!" You imitated him.

He smiled. "But what even is true love?"

"It's knowing things. It's hanging out. It's making memories. It's liking a person so much that you can't call this 'liking,'" You explained, "That's what love is."

"Then I'm in love with you."

"Mammon..."

"I know stuff! I know you listen to cheesy romance songs in the shower! I know you secretly love watching Ruri-chan videos with Levi! And that your favorite cookies are chocolate chip because Luke makes them perfectly! What else do I need to know?"

Tears streamed down your face. "Mammon," You whispered, "How do you know all of that?"

"I listen to you."

"I usually don't think that you're actually listening though."
"Exactly. That's why I'm so easy to talk to," He said with a shrug.

You sighed. "Mammon," He looked at you hopefully. "I'll consider it."

"What?"

"I'll consider dating you, okay?"

"Promise?!"

"Promise."