Avengers Oneshots

Loki and his knives

*set after ragnarok thanos never happened*

"Why am I here again?" Loki asked Thor as they landed at Avengers Tower. 

"Because, you're an avanger now. Wanda convinced Stark that just like her, you should be given a second chance, specially after what you did for Asgard." Thor said for the millionth time. 

"No, I get that, but why am I here?" Loki said, causing Thor to roll his eyes for the billionth time. 

"It is Lady Pepper's birthday. Stark invited all Avengers to celebrate."  

"Thor! Loki! Good you're here! Come on in!" Tony said, as he approached them from the entrance of the rooftop. Just as the heroes were about to enter the room, Pepper approached them. 

"Uh uh! This is a birthday party! Nobody is bringing weapons! They all go into the weapons holder!" she stated, before pointing at a large 3 foot basket with all the Avengers weapons in it. Loki couldn't believe it. The very weapons the Avengers had used to hit him with were lying in a sad excuse of a basket right in front of him. Thor dutifully put his hammer into the basket, and then everyone looked at Loki expectantly. He sighed. 

"I'm going to need another basket." he stated. Pepper assumed he was saying that because the first basket was nearly full, so she went and brought another basket. 

The next few minutes, Loki took off his boots and started emptying knives into it. Then, the next few minutes, out. of. his. hair! And then he got to his sleeves, pulling out at least 15 different types of knives. and then he reached his pants, pulling out swords, katanas, throwing stars, practically every type of blade the world knew. 

The empty basket kept getting fuller and fuller. Pepper sighed in relief once Loki stopped pulling out more. 

"Oh no, I'm not done. I was simply stopping to ask for another basket." Loki said, smiling guiltily. Pepper's eyes widened, but she took out another basket from storage and put it. It took Loki 10 more minutes before he finally declared himself weapon less. 

"Why do you have so many knives on you, brother?" Thor asked, exasperated as they finally reached the others and were handed a few drinks. 

"So many? Brother, that wasn't so many! That was not enough at all, but I listened to you and got barely any weapons!" Loki exclaimed. 

"You spent 10 minutes pulling out weapons!" 

"Yes, and on an average day it would take me 30 minutes!" Loki yelled back. 

"What about on a battle?" Nat asked, interested. Loki smirked. 

"In a battle, I would last for a full year without needing to get them back." Nat laughed, clapping him on the back and clinking her glass with his as they both drank together, sharing their private joke that caused everyone to be confused. She had quite a similar experience with Pepper, so she found it quite funny. 

The two knife buddies spent the rest of the evening comparing weapons, while everyone shuddered at the thought of what the world would be like if the 2 allied.