❝ love let me fly so high, but the reality dropped me so deep. ❞
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you've been driving for quite a while now and have left the small town behind you.
during the first ten minutes, you kept turning around, looking to see if anyone was following you and expecting to hear the siren of a police car wailing at any moment.
the fear of being discovered has grown even more with the sudden appearance of the police.
you glance at hyouma, who is holding the steering wheel tensely in his hands, his gaze fixed on the empty street.
his head is full of "what if" ideas. he can't get the image of the police officers and the voices from the hallway out of his head.
"we shouldn't have stayed in that motel," he mumbles quietly to himself.
you lower your head a little guiltily, but you don't even regret having spent the night there - on the contrary, you're glad you did. your body was really longing for a mattress, because for the first time in a long time you don't have back pain.
"but nothing happened. the cops weren't even after us" you say, your voice soft and careful.
his hands clench tightly on the steering wheel. "it was just too risky. besides, we don't know if the cops know about us. and imagine if i hadn't reacted so quickly in the hallway, the guy could have shot you."
his voice is dripping with worry. the constant fear and pressure are too much for you, for him even more than for you.
because it's hyouma's hands that have blood on them, not yours.
"i'm sorry" you now say and lean your head against the window pane.
you know how difficult the whole situation is for both of you.
and you also know that it has been very risky.
you are constantly putting yourselves in danger, you think.
you're constantly causing him worries, goes through your mind.
and only because of you hyouma has killed.
of his own free will of course, because he wanted to protect you. but if it weren't for you, he would have a carefree life now.
then he would not be a criminal now.
the guilty thoughts that haunt your mind like ghosts are clearly visible on your face. at a quick glance from him to you, he sees it - your expression, which could not be more guilty.
instantly, he reaches out with one hand and intertwines your fingers.
"stop blaming yourself for anything," he says, his gaze still fixed on the street.
you look out the window, your teeth about to pearl your fingernails. hyouma squeezes your hand lightly, not liking your silence. he can literally see your thoughts, as if they were inscribed on signs and placed above your head.
