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Entry 2
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Welcome to Author's Entries
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[ ! Mentions of Homophobia and Transphobia ! ]
January 19, 2022
Wednesday, 5:35am
Author's Gender and Sexuality.
Well, at first Author thought that Male and Female are the only two genders and Author though that being Bisexual, Gay, Pansexual, Omnisexual, and others is a sin-well, that is what he was taught, and told. He was told that it was a sin when they were 12 years old or younger...
For the longest time as he grew-he still thought that it was a sin, until the age of 13 to 14 years old, around that time it was probably the start of the pandemic.
Their grandmother, told him that they cannot be bisexual, gay, because it was a sin, his grandmother told the Author that the LGBTQ people chose to be like this and she told the Author that they could control to be gay...
Author asked her a what if one of her grandchild is non-binary or transgender, would she support and respect?
Author's grandmother answered no, she said this, "No! I will not respect or support them! If you are born a girl, you will always be a girl!"
. . .
Author felt their heart break when their grandmother answered, that's when Author knew that they will never get the love and support they wanted from their grandmother.
At first, before Author was at the age of 14, they thought that the world is full of dirty and disgusting beings because of the LGBTQ people.
But by the time they were 12 or 13 and a half, that's when they found out that it's the hate against LGBTQ, homophobia, transphobia.
The homophobic and transphobic people. The more Author grows, the more he realizes the truth.
Truth to be told, Author came out to his parents as non-binary on their 14th birthday, and it went well...
But they never come out to their parents as bisexual. Knowing the fact that they won't like it. At all.
"BuT aUtHoR!¡!¡ It'S iN tHe BibLe!¡"
Shut it. Author plans to leave his religion at the age of 18. And the fact that Author is already baptized didn't make it easier.
They felt more horrible because he didn't want to go on a Bible lesson in the first place. But he can't argue, their parents signed them up.
Of course, Author is happy that their friends supports them as bisexual, and their fellow supportive Christian was so happy that Author trusts him for telling him that Author is bisexual.
They don't chat often, but they are still friends till to this day.
As for Author's Sexuality and Gender identity, their bisexual, and non-binary.
Though, he's not sure of being non-binary actually, he feels comfortable using they/them and he/him, neutral feeling being called a boy, doesn't like using she/her, slightly uncomfortable being called a girl, and basically just okay being called non-binary.
There are some moments where Author is just in the middle, not they/them or he/him, like, just in the middle.
They haven't exactly researched some gender identities that fit what they're feeling. He is slightly hoping someone could help them out.
Author wishes you all a nice day/night/noon!
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