Starry Night Thoughts

So it's been a while

I've got like, three drafts on here from where there was something I was going to talk about and then it went out the freaking window and now I haven't existed on here in like, a year or more. 

Except I have. Lurking.  Laughing at stuff with some of my friends. Discord's been great to see what unmentionable fanfictions exist and then send the link through. We'll come up with the craziest things and search it, and suddenly you find out that humanity has dipped so low to have Mario x Toad, Mr. Clean fanfic, and some poor soul who did a Micheal Myers x Colonel Sanders as a joke. 

I'm the only one of my friends that has an account on here and I hope to GOD they don't decide to check out my username and stuff I wrote. Like, yeah, it's not deeply embarrassing things but at the same time 

:cringe

I question sometimes if I want to throw the random drafts of things and mini scripts or whatever that have been rotting in the "unpublished" section of this account. Nothing's done. Doesn't really make sense. BUT it would be amusing to throw the thought process that is my brain out there. 

And then I think about it for a sec and manage to convince myself "o i still write stuff now and then". 

LOL no I don't. I throw dialogue onto a page and try to figure out just how much blood a human can lose without dying and what a shotgun to the gut does to people without getting images to show  up on google. Which yeah, I get that's the usual searches for stuff, but I always wonder how many watchlists I'm on. AND my own personal FBI agent has probably begun to get a tiny bit more alarmed because I've gotten into horror movies recently. 

Yeah. Over the country shutdown and everything people got into exercise or productive habits, meanwhile me :

HORROR 

and it's not the horror that makes you think. It's the slasher kind of horror. The brainless stuff that  makes the characters brainless by the end. All the og slashers and their sequels, the Evil Dead series, whatever crappy ones you snag on Netflix, and my favorite: Scream. (the new one is insanely fun, fyi). 

There are days I question what happened. When the actual heck did slasher movies become a thing I like?  I don't like extreme gore or nudity  but yet I sit my happy little butt down and laugh my head off when they come of tv. Do they scare me? Not in the slightest. They  stupid. 

Maybe that's why. It's predictable. Everyone dies, the end-- except for that one final girl who you've probably liked the whole way through the movie. 

Now what does scare me? Sci-fi horror. Alien is  honestly one of my favorite horror movies, and The Thing follows pretty darn close behind. I could watch them too many times to be healthy and just marvel at how they make the hair on the back of my neck stand up and do it all with practical effects. It's just awesome. 

And then there's the Grudge and that can go burn in a hole. If I never hear the ghost sound effect again it will be too soon. 

(Phasmophobia laughed in my face at that. The first ghost I died to did that sound and I had a stroke)

I'll wear t-shirts with the monsters on them to school and weird people out. It's kinda cool. One of my teachers is always asking me about the monsters or movies and I'll answer. I'm in a music school though, so I guess weirdness is expected from us. 

That's another thing: explain to me the logic of going and performing with a group at a national sporting event and being excited and wanting to do it again, but yet when I get in front of an instrument I have played for half my life and am literally getting a degree in and have to perform in front of maybe 15 teachers my brain nopes the f out? What? I've been in situations far more stressful what that but yet noooooooo. All that practice goes out the window and we're winging it from here. What music that was memorized? Doesn't exist to me.

I kind of feel like that was a train derailment situation there. Sorry 😅 

...

Wow. 735 words of rambling that very well may never get posted. Or it might. I dunno. Still debating on that tbh. 

(Spoiler alert, you posted it)

I genuinely miss being able to post stuff on here though. The comments and pure chaos was always fun to sit through. I want to start it up again but I should probably finish whatever I'm doing before I post it, that way it doesn't end up like the two or three ONC things that have been neglected for the past few years. 

Ideas are easy. Writing is hard. Writing for the heck of it is harder. Debating about leaving thing never finished on the internet is interesting. 

I was going to use thing to give updates or whatever for what goes on now but the funny thing is, nothing goes on. School does. That's on repeat for another few years. Driving does. I can't wait for the idiots of the road to please and kindly go away. Video games are fun. Movies. Life. Friends. The awkwardness of asking random people questions. The enjoyment when people decide to just go with it and a shared braincell moment happens. Geeking out over the randomest things. 

...

Speaking of

Studio Ghibli music is amazing and you cannot convince me otherwise. 

The reasons I believe this:
Watch the Ghibli concert where Joe Hisaichi is conducting. I swear to you, you will never see a happier dude. He was pure joy.

I watched both Princess Mononoke and Howl's Moving Castle for the first time the other day and music plays such an insane part of what you feel during those movies. I desperately need to figure out how to play pieces from each one-- to the point I can't explain the amount I want to play them. It's honestly awesome.

On an unrelated to music note, Christian Bale aka Patrick Bateman aka BATMAN voices Howl in the English version and I legit don't know how to feel about it? It probably didn't help that I watched Howl's Moving Castle within an hour of finishing Batman Begins. Imagine my surprise when the voice of Bruce Wayne is tap dancing through the freaking sky with Sophie. My brain did a full in blue screen of death for a few seconds while I processed what I heard.

Honestly though, they were both really cute movies. Now to figure out which Ghibli film to watch next...

...

Anyway, it's July now. It wasn't when I wrote this out and never posted it. One day I think I'll form a coherent thought and not run off SHINY! brain, but today evidently isn't that day. In terms of shtuff going on here, Beast's Castle managed to get on the Editor's  Favorites list in June(?) I believe, which was pretty cool, and Retold gave it book of the month for July, which is even cooler. 

It's honestly awesome that people like to read it. I've forgotten about it completely and totally written it off as a *thing* but yeah. Pretty neat. 

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I don't know what this is tbh. It was seriously going to be an update but now I guess it's more of a "point A meet point Z with no way of knowing how we got here" situation. At the very least it's an I'm not dead update, in case anyone randomly wondered that at some point.

But yeah. Hi.

Bye.