Station 19 one shots

Andy Herrera - Silence

Yeah, I'd rather be a lover than a fighter (fighter)

'Cause all my life, I've been fighting

Andy smiled at little Pru knowing how free she'll be growing up, she thought back to her childhood where her farther and mother were still together and she didn't have to worry about war called 'Life' on the way. She had been recruited by JIST (Junior International Space Teams) aged 8 and greatly enjoyed it. But the war called 'Life' Genesis, Summit and many others really did a number on her.

Never felt a feeling of comfort, oh

And all this time, I've been hiding

Pruitt was a good dad after her mum died, he tried but Andy was never easy on him her happy persona had been changed to a tough nut who didn't cry or show any emotion. She was hiding her true feelings. Especially when she turned 17, Andy lost her husband Miles Cayden and 5 month old child on the same day in a base explosion. After that Andy came across as cold and hypocritical overall a person you wouldn't like to be friends with as a way to not care about anyone enough to loose.

And I never had someone to call my own, oh nah

I'm so used to sharing

Love only left me alone

She thought no one would ever love her till she found Robert as after all most of her relationships aside from Miles were friends with benefits. Then Robert turned her away like everyone else.

But I'm at one with the silence

I found peace in your violence

Can't tell me there's no point in trying

Andy didn't care she worked hard to get where she was a Major in JIST had her own ship USS Constellation. She stood on one of the beach in San Francisco Bay underneath the Golden Gate Bridge, the stars twinkled peacefully above her as the water lapped gently at her feet. Her soul was at peace at last. You couldn't tell her there's no point in trying, JIST gave her the stamina to be stubborn and determined to not miss out on life. She had joined the army as soon as she turned 18 as America being pricks didn't count JIST personnel as veterans, Andy had a lot of fun admiring the commodity in the armed forces.

I'm at one, and I've been quiet for too long

I found peace in your violence

Becoming a firefighter allowed Andy to repay the lives she took.

Can't tell me there's no point in trying

I'm at one, and I've been silent for too long

Andy ignored the harsh comments of 19 and many others knowing that there'll never know or understand the real Andy locked away deep down inside of her.

I've been quiet for too long

I've been quiet for too long

She couldn't take it anymore she just couldn't. She hated doing this to herself, it made her sick which didn't help. Every insult was a hammer to her glass heart. Andy let her toes hang over the edge as she stared off into the horizon.

I found peace in your violence

Can't tell me there's no point in trying

I'm at one, and I've been quiet for too long

The ocean breeze was refreshing as it blew through her curly hair.

I'm in need of a savior (savior), but I'm not asking for favours

Andy's asked for help to get out of it. Even begged. But they all wanted something in return, always something they couldn't have.

My whole life, I've felt like a burden

I think too much, and I hate it

Her heart would thump against her chest as she tore apart every compliment she was ever given to find an underlying insult. Her heart and her head were constantly at war with no peace or mutual ground. It was exhausting. Nobody understanding made it 10x harder. Andy's attempt to help was always met with sarcasm, it would pound at her every time.

I'm so used to being in the wrong, I'm tired of caring

Andy couldn't care anymore, she was always wrong so she just went numb. Day by day it became ignoring and forgetting emotion became easier. If those who loved her truly could see her now, they wouldn't see the joyful Andy Herrera who was always down for a good laugh, they would see an abused shell.

Loving never gave me a home, so I'll sit here in the silence

She didn't mind though. One day she could reunite with those who loved her.

I found peace in your violence

Can't tell me there's no point in trying

I'm at one, and I've been quiet for too long

Any day now she felt like she could break and just snap. Andy looked hard to find the peace in the violent situation sometimes its very hard.

I found peace in your violence

Can't tell me there's no point in trying

I'm at one, and I've been silent for too long

Oh would they treat Andy right. Back to the pay she lay flat on her back staring up at the stars, they would say up on the station that the stars were our loved ones thats why the Galaxy always seemed to grow. "Miles why did you have to leave," she sobbed choking on her words.

I've been quiet for too long

I've been quiet for too long

That was it. Andy Herrera couldn't take it any longer. She snapped on shift as they were complaining about presumably how hard there lives were, "Will you shut up! There are people in this world starving on the streets with war ranging around them. Children in this world have never seen a Christmas tree or received a present from Santa Clause. I serve in JIST for crying out loud, I have had to sign over two thousand death certificates everyones life is hard for different reasons but what makes me sick is when the privileged don't acknowledge the privileges they have, the things they take advantage of. I am very fortunate compared to a refugee. Own how lucky you are for crying out loud," "Woah Herrera chill," "No I won't want to know why? Because my son would have been 13 today but thanks to war he will forever remain 5 months old. He wasn't even crawling when he died in his crib because he couldn't be reached by emergency services. So excuse me for being emotional!"

I found peace in your violence

Can't tell me there's no point in trying

I'm at one, and I've been quiet for too long

With the world released from her shoulders sitting on that waters edge was easier, in the distance on the horizon she saw a teenager with a man not much older at his side. They were waving at her from the distance it was Miles and her son, "We'll see you on the other side, I'll look after him move on Andy please for us." Her life seemed to immediately look up.

AN: should I do one for Maya next? Any requests are welcome