Alone | TodoBaku Angst One-Shots

6 | I Believe You

Todoroki stared down at his tantalizing future that rested in the palms of his hands. He traced his thumbs over the rough, thick strands of brown woven over and under each other like snakes.

How could I have been so blind? I should've known. I should've known better. I was just selfish to think that it wasn't all true. I'm sorry for being selfish all this time, thinking I was right...

"I hate you, Icyhot."

That's not my problem. You're the one feeling that hatred—I'm not bothered.

I believe you.

"Icyhot, you're fucking weak."

Maybe for your standards. I think I'm doing well for myself.

I believe you.

"You're pathetic. Get your shit together, dammit."

I'm trying my best, and that's what matters.

I believe you.

"Don't even fucking look at me, Icyhot. No one wants to see that ugly-ass burn."

I never really thought about how people would look at me because of it...

You're absolutely right.

"Falling just shy of the mark must run in the family, huh?"

You don't need to say it to my face. I already know.

That's exactly how it goes.

"No wonder you're so damn fat. That's enough soba for an entire fucking family."

I guess the numbers on the scale are pretty high. I'm...fat?

And I still can't burn off enough fat to be content.

"Is it just me, or are you getting worse every time I see you? Shape up. You're not working hard enough. Pathetic."

I'm not working hard enough... I really am pathetic.

I always have been pathetic.

"Why do you look so depressed? What, do you want me to give you a pocket knife so you can go cut yourself? Would that wipe that shitty expression off your face?"

If I cut myself, would you be happier? Would it make this awful feeling go away? I'm tired of people telling me I look sad or depressed. It's...not that. I just...feel empty.

I deserve every cut I've given myself.

"Do you wanna die? Because it looks like you're trying to eat your way to an early grave. Fat."

Dying would be so much easier, wouldn't it? But I'm eating so much less than before. Is this not enough? But...you're right, Bakugou. I'm fat.

No matter how much weight I've lost after all of this, it's not enough...

"Why've you missed so much goddamn class? How lazy can you possibly be?"

I can't even get out of bed sometimes... I'm so lazy. How can it be difficult to get out of bed? It's not difficult at all, and yet...

All I've ever been is so fucking lazy.

"Stop acting like you're depressed all the time. I know you're not. Get over it and show me what you've got. Not like it matters when you're this goddamn weak."

I want to cry...but I can't. I should just get over myself, but I never can. I'm so fucking pathetic. Why? Why am I like this? What's wrong with me? I don't understand at all...

You're right. I'm not depressed, and I never have been. I'm just lazy and weak.

"Icyhot, y'know what you are? Better off dead. Leave your sorry excuses behind and fight."

I believe you.

I believe you.

"I believe you. I'm...better off dead. Thank you for making me realize that. I'll give you what you've wanted all this time, Bakugou. Even then...you'll probably laugh and tell my dead body that I still fucked it up. But...I can't take it anymore... It was never your fault. All you did was tell me the truth. It was my fault for not realizing how worthless I am. I hope you're happy now, Bakugou."

Todoroki ducked his head into the noose in his hands.

This is what you wanted, right?