Cracked Mirrors | Remus Lupin

𝐎𝐧𝐞 | 𝐂

"Combat... I am ready for any combat."

Somewhere in the past, those seven words used to singlehandedly rock her world.

She used to be ready.

Not anymore.

As a reminder of a long-forgotten dream, those words had decided to make a sudden appearance in her life and add to the many thoughts she was trying to fit in her head throughout the day. Despite having sleepless nights and endless nightmares, that particular memory was enough reason to turn the upcoming winter into the coldest and most unwelcoming season Y/N had ever experienced.

She shook her head and practically dragged those tired feet of hers into the deserted room and settled on the nearest sofa, not bothering much for the round door being left open. Sofie would as well return to the common room now that the clock had struck past midnight.

The pain in her neck, though not unbearable, was foreign and new to her. It had an unmistakable sense of persistence in it. As if it was there to stay for some time.

Similar to every other pain flowing through her veins.

It seemed like a lifetime since she had the bravery to articulate such confession and encourage her innermost self to never fear the coming threats or circumstances of the war. Now the air around her was thick with anything but readiness for any approaching or awaiting combat.

A long sigh was followed as she rested her head back on the plush material, glancing up at the numerous plants hanging from the ceiling. It was hard to deny it in moments like this, but crowded places had become the bane of her life and she tolerated each day just waiting for peaceful nights.

Other than the ghosts that floated freely around the empty corridors, the rest of the castle were fast asleep. The magical lanterns were off and the noises were muffled, leaving her to be enveloped in serene darkness, with only the soft glow of the fireplace casting dancing shadows across the yellowish walls. The crackling sound of burning logs easily filled the air and created a comforting ambiance around her. The whole scenery emitted calmness and familiarity, but she was only there to mingle with the her surroundings, pretending that everything was fine on her side.

And everything was really good.

So why was it still restless inside her? Why was it that she couldn't calm her impatient heart?

Life was back to its normal pace. Dark power was gone and people had no reason to live in fear anymore. The mere thought of waking up in a peaceful world that was far from turning into a battleground, would bring a sense of comfort to anyone.

Not to her though.

It almost felt like she was still trapped in the middle of an endless battle; without finding any road to escape, without having any chance to win, and without seeing any sign of her opponent.

Everything was invisible.

And she had to know. Not all the wars were fought in the visible world. Sometimes the eyes couldn't see their nemisis.

But all she know was that she wasn't ready for any war to break loose inside her. She waq too tired for it. So she had shoved her feelings and past memories aside, numbing her senses as much as possible. No one needed to know how she actually felt. Just making sure that every duty was carried out and every mission was accomplished successfully was enough for her. For them. She was one of the Hogwart's great warriors after all.

A warrior that was not even able to save herself, her dreams, and her stories.

All those years ago, her younger version had found herself secretly interested in recording daily events in a small diary. Her friends Elara, Sofie, The Weasley twins and many more had seen the keen writer growing up within that little girl right from the first year. They used to read over the drafts of her work at breakfast table, Fred mimicking Elara's blue expression and tearful eyes whenever she reached a particularly sad part in the story.