Chapter 17

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"Hey, did you get my text?" Ben rested his hand on my shoulder as he came around to face me.

"Yeah." I vaguely remembered some sweet words about being anxious to see me again. "But not until much later. I went to bed early."
I'd finally fallen back asleep last night at about two o'clock and woke up at four with a stomach full of knots.

After my disgusting behavior yesterday in class and the way I'd gotten sidetracked from my goals, I decided to give up the tough-girl act. Her game was too hard, and I was turning into a person I didn't like.

I needed to talk to Dinah, but I wasn't sure how to handle her. My temper still flared over the idea of her and Lauren dating, but one thing she said made sense. This anger wasn't getting me anywhere, and I wanted to move on. I just didn't know if I could without holding a grudge.

"So would you like to go out this weekend? There's a bonfire at Tyler Hitchen's place on Friday night after the race."
"I'd love to, but I'm so swamped right now. I'll have to see how my week goes." I closed the locker door and began inching away.

"Can I help with anything?" Ben's knit his eyebrows together in concern. It was sweet and made me smile.
"Well, you can't run my laps for me, or do my Math or Science, or take my tests, so you're pretty useless.

"Yes, yes, I am. I see you've been talking to my mom." His eyes shined with amusement, and his grin was teasing. "Try to make yourself free. It'll be fun."
Hannah the Bitch walked by us with her crew, and they threw Ben some sultry looks of the you-don't-even-need-to-buy-me-dinner variety. Their antics were so transparent. Flipping hair and biting your bottom lip? Really? Who does that? She slapped me with an "L" for loser, and I flipped her off behind Ben's back as they walked past.

I guess I should be delighted that a guy like Ben wanted to date me. Hannah, and probably most of the other girls in this school, would be grateful to have his attention. He was attentive and behaved like a gentleman. I enjoyed spending time with him. It was just taking longer than I thought it would to develop a spark.
"Fine," I answered. "I'll try."
He took my bag and walked me to Physics. "Meet you at lunch?" He looked at me expectantly.

"Sure. I'll be sitting outside today." His presence would be welcome. I might need a buffer between Dinah and myself if I lost my temper again.
"See you there." His voice was low and warm. Arriving at class, he handed me my bag and backed away, heading off down the hall.

I wished I was more into Ben. Maybe I just needed to get to know him better.
The surprise Physics quiz burned panic right through my bones. Luckily, it was enough to take my mind off my personal life. I'd done the reading and completed the questions this morning in my haze, but I still felt unprepared.

The running we did in P.E. afterwards let off the steam of the morning. Even though Coach was testing us on our mile run time, and I completed that in six minutes flat, she let me keep running. The burn in my muscles singed off the frustration and hurt of Laurens words last night that had been floating through my head all morning.

I wouldn't care if you were alive or dead. My heels dug into the dirt as I envisioned digging her grave.
"Hey, you guys." Dinah came up behind Ben and me where we sat at a picnic table outside, eating our lunch.
"Hi," I said through a mouthful of pasta salad, unable to meet her eyes.
"So how are you doing, Ben? Ready for the game Friday?"

"I'm not as worried about the game as I am the race later that night. I've got
some money riding on Wonderboy in there." He jerked his thumb towards the cafeteria, referring to Lauren , I would assume.
"Oh, well she's a safe bet." She smirked and waved her hand in the air. "I'll be at the race, too. Are you bringing Camila ?" Her gaze slid to me.
"I didn't think she'd enjoy the race, but I'm trying to get her to the bonfire afterwards."

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