delaney gray or best known as laney, was a good girl, good grades, model student and nice to everybody.
oh and she's also my best friend.
growing up was hard, at 5 her moms passed after battling a long illness and although laney doesn't really remember much about her mom as she was always sick, she remembered the warmth and security from her mothers caring nature and warm heart, traits that were passed onto laney.
after her moms death it was always just laney and her dad, he was her best friend. they would do everything together, from dragging him to get their nails done together - to suffering through boring baseball games, you would never catch them apart.
but after laney's dad got fired from his job things went downhill fast, he turned to drugs. anything he could get his hands on but pills and heroin mostly.
the last few years had been a blur for laney, filled with her dads ever growing battle with addiction; life had been hard.
about 6 months ago he overdosed and passed away, laney struggled a lot but never told a soul of the heartbreak she was enduring.
she stopped showing at school, rarely ate or took care of herself and stopped reaching out to those who cared. she was stuck in a cycle of sadness and grief.
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get out of bed now, we're outside
rue i love you guys but i'm just too tired too hang i'm sorry
bitch i'm not playing get up or maddy is gonna break your fucking door down
fuck you rue
getting out of bed was the hardest part, the thought of pulling away the covers made me ache, more than usual. but i cared for my friends, despite me not showing them it recently, i cared so deeply for every single one of them, they were the reason i was still alive.
but they had started to get sick of seeing their sweet and pretty laney get drowned by her own sadness, they weren't the only ones sick of it.
it had become just as painful for me as it was for them to watch me fade away.
so slowly i peeled away the warm covers to reveal my weak legs beneath them. i didn't want too move but i had too, i wasn't just doing this for my friends i was doing this for me; i wanted to get better.
"come on laney you can do this" i encouraged myself.
"this is the start of new beginnings no more hurt" i whispered.
***
longingly i turned the handle of the front door, ready for the wrath of the cold air and squealing girls to hit my skin.
but fuck my slow movements, maddy had pushed the door open and ran forward to hold me in an embrace.
"bitch i've missed you so fucking much" she chimed to me.
but i wasn't listening , i was too busy paying attention this hug. the first bit of human contact i had had in ages, and well i was taking it all in, i needed it.
pulling away from maddys sweet smelling arms i spoke the first few words that had left my mouth in months, "i missed you too maddy" i spoke to her sorrowfully.
rue then stepped foward and ruffled my already matted hair "i missed you kid" she smiled.
i smiled back and let cassie,lexi and kat walk through the door as well, each of them greeting me with an apologetic look.
"right let's get this party started" maddie and cassie screamed.
"we were both young when i first saw you, i closed my eyes and the flashback starts i'm standin' there...."
blasted through the air, love story by taylor swift was our jam.
from the age of about 5 we would all scream this at the top of our lungs, whilst dressing up and dancing around.
but there was no time to ponder on the nostalgic memories that i longed so much to revisit, maddy quickly grabbed me and sat me down on the bathroom counter.
"come on bitch cheer up this is your jam" she smiled at me.
i liked that about maddy the fact i knew that she had my best interests at heart, even when she seemed tough.
"i love you maddy, thank you." i said whilst humming along to the song.
laney was a people pleaser, she never spoke up when she felt hurt or when something was wrong.
she kept quiet.
just like she was in this moment, we all knew she didn't want our help or our company but she would never say it.
so she went along with it, like always.
***
" three, two, one" maddie smiled along with the rest of the girls. spinning me around and revealing my dolled up self in the mirror.
my reflection was something i hadn't seen in a long time, greif didn't just make me hate my life, it made me hate myself as well.
but despite the fact of me not feeling great, i had to say that i looked great. and looking great was just the start of feeling great.
" oh my god i love you guys so much" i said through glossy eyes.
"i'm sorry i've been such a bitch recently, but i have missed every single one of you" i smiled.
"we're here for you laney every step of the way" lexi cooed.
immediately met with a shower of agreements from the others.
"bitch shuttup with the soppy stuff and get up, we have a party to attend." maddy said with excitement.
laney used to love parties, she was known best for getting absolutely smashed with maddy and creating some kind of messy scene. but her love of party's now, i wasn't so sure about.
i thought about disagreeing, but then i also thought about the fight maddy and cassie would put up if i said no. and in all honesty i missed my old party girl self.
