Suprising Intelligence

15

"What was that Rainer! We had it under our boots before you interjected!"

Blond hair shifted and swayed in the wind. A strong gust gave a good excuse for him to turn away.

"... I mean, we don't have to kill them, do we?"

Another blond head of hair shot up before pulling at his shoulder

"It, Rainer, is going to make our job a lot harder. I suggest that you think long and hard about why we came here." She walked to the edge and gazed over the now blocked hole in the wall. A quick plan it would have been if someone didn't get cold feet 

"Remember why. Remember what we risk to lose. Remember what we already lost."

♤♡◇♧

Mission success… but at what cost?

That titan from before wasn't just abnormal. It was Erin, or something Erin made. Hanji is still freaking out, so I can't get them to explain. Even with their limitless excitement, I don't think it can fix my mood.

I still can't believe it. A human turned titan.

This raises a lot of questions. Too many about me to willingly think through. Was that what broke down the wall? Was it humans? Why would a group of humans want to kill their own kin?

Agh, my head. It's been pounding ever since yesterday. It's so much.

Too much.

Too much for me to handle.

I went to cover my head with my hand, but a familiar creaking of metal and friction of rope stopped me. I guess it was bound to happen. When Erin was sent to the big castle thing, I was also brought up. I think they covered for me.

If people in power got told that there were actually two sentient titans, I wouldn't be here. Hanji, Erwin, and amazingly Levi, all vouched that I was just Hanji's experiment and locked tight for safety. I'm sure more was said, but Levi was the one telling me, so I guess I'll have to find out later when he gets over himself.

A whimper escaped my lips as I tried to adjust my uncomfortable position. Nobody is out, so I'll probably be alone for the rest of tonight. It makes sense, it is right after a mission. It doesn't make it any easier for me.

After this past year, being without someone near me has been really hard. So much stress and my mind yelling at me has put me over the edge of panic more than I can count.

Maybe it's not actually that bad. I can't count very high.

More has happened here than my whole life outside of the walls. It's been nice in some parts, but so much goes wrong. The hate, the solitary, the constant action, the stress of not knowing whether I'm going to live or not.

I don't know how much more I can take

"Jayden? Are you alright dear?"

Like a wave washing me from all that pains me, color returns to my sight and a familiar face comes into view. Tears of relief fall as I curl my lips as big as I could.

"Well I like the smile! But why are you crying? Do you want to talk abo- WOOOAA!"

I broke some restraints as I lifted Hanji and planted them onto my face. They blush a deep red and giggle a bit before returning the hug. Mabey in spite of the sun, I kept this position as I started to doze off.

I can deal with anything as long as I have my friends. My mind is quiet and still. The world has beauty and meaning.

I think Armin would be proud of me. I think this is one of those "cliché" things.

I don't care, this is heaven. It just has to last the rest of my life, and we are golden.