Creature of Creation

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Okay So my first thought would be DAMN. why you have to make my first review so hard to find corrections lolXD

I actually LOVED this book. at first, I think I was a little worried just due to the fact that human experiment escaping abusive lab is definitely a something that has been done a good many times, but when I started to read it, I was very impressed with the originality of the story and how unique it was. It is very clear that you have spent a lot of time thinking through your story and the characters.  I also love the fact that you use knowledge from your career to help add details like for the injuries and identifying specific parts of the body.

 I thought that although the general idea has been done before you did a great job making it unique and unpredictable. I also loved how much details you put into each of the characters. Like how the reader gets to understand things from not only Clay and Anpeal's perspective, but also from James, Rufus, Smith, Sam, Zach, and Gabriel's perspective. It makes it so that the reader can truly grow attached to each character and understand them completely. It's like instead of following a straight line with one character we get to see all of the different threads and how they intertwine as well as why. 

I also thought that Anpeal's name was very clever how she was named after the angel. Although I couldn't quite figure out where Clay's name came from? Was it because she is being made into something like clay? because from what it seems like Smith never named them so I'm guessing they either named themselves or Racheal named them.

I loved how you spun religion into the story too. I myself am Christian, but a lot of rules from the catholic church tend to bother me and so I appreciate how openly minded this book is where there are people on both sides of the religion like Racheal and Cameron. 

However, I can't help but wonder what Racheal would think about Clay and Anpeal's  relationship?

Constructive Criticism

Okay so the first thing that I noticed would be the length of your epilogue. Because not gonna lie when I saw that it was an hour long read for the epilogue alone, I was kind of like "oh boy". Now I'm not saying to necessarily take anything out because once I had read it I felt that it all connected to the story very nicely, but maybe try breaking it down a bit? Because like I did readers are going to see how long the epilogue is right away and they are gonna back away from the story without giving it a chance. I would recommend like breaking it down into chapters and calling it part one. Then the part on the farm could be part 2 and the part where they get captured again could be part 3 or something like that.  I would also maybe recommend that if you change it into chapters try writing a short epilogue like from Racheal's perspective. Like maybe what she felt the day she was able to hold Anpeal? Or something that hints at like a great power in her.

The second thing that I would like to mention is the relationship between Anpeal and Clay. It is very clear that they have a strong bond as well as Clay's crush on Anpeal. I absolutely love how Clay is in love with Anpeal while Anpeal is just completely oblivious. However, while the connection is clear it is kind of hard to feel any chemistry between them.  I am no expert on love though.  I know that their relationship has a lot of potential if you want them to end up together. (I mean though for all I know Anpeal could end up rejecting Clay in which case the setup is good for that although I would be very sad:(). 

I think though that this is just due to the lack of interaction between the two. Because for most of their interactions where they talk to each other they are either in mortal danger or fighting. Maybe insert a few scenes of them messing around with each other or flirting. Because I can see Clay will do anything for Anpeal, but it's kind of hard to see why. Like what made Clay fall in love with Anpeal in the first place? was there a specific action or event? Or was it just the constant friendship in her loneliest of times? Because there is definitely a sense of innocence in Anpeal however, she also comes off as kind of a brat. And if that is your goal and part of her character that is totally fine! But maybe add in a scene of like her cleaning off Clay's wounds to Clay's reluctance or something like that. because it doesn't seem like Anpeal really cares at all about Clay as more then like a mother.  and again, if that is what you're going for then that is totally fine too! because right now it feels like if the danger were to go away their relationship would fall apart. You just have to add a scene or two to show the two of them together happily for even a moment. Like if they went for a walk in the woods and forgot about the danger what would happen? Because Clay is always so focused on protecting Anpeal when they interact that it is hard to imagine what would happen if she didn't have to protect Anpeal.

I would also recommend making it so that it is Clay that notices small things that Anpeal does instead of describing them to the reader. Like have Clay notice all of the minute details of Anpeals body and habits that she does when she feels certain ways. (This can be the same for Anpeal too depending on how Anpeal feels about Clay). Like for example when they are feeding the chickens. How does the light make her look? what is she wearing? Is her hair neat or free flowing? what does she do with her hands when she gets nervous?  Maybe have Clay notice how much Anpeal had filled out since they arrived. Things like that if that makes any sense.

One last thing that I noticed was just that the chapters are fairly uneven in length. And I mean this isn't really a huge problem or something that you have to worry too much on or even really have to spend time fixing more just something to keep in mind for the future because some of your chapters range from 10 minutes to 21 minutes. Of course, that could also be Wattpad too lol.

Overall though I thought your writing style was gorgeous. I also loved your attention to details. Like how in the beginning, you can tell that Clay has lost hope by how she refers to herself as E1 as if she has completely accepted her place, but then when she is at the farm, she has hope for a future and thinks of herself as more than an experiment, but as Clay, a girl. I also love how Clay is constantly drawing up her own blood like on her fingers or her cheek.

Your book truly engaged me to the point of where I just wanted to keep reading it. I noticed that when you put the status in the form you said that the book was complete and that you were still editing. I however would personally recommend that if you already have it written out to post the rest of the story and then keep editing it once it is out. Once it is all out you will have a better chance of getting discovered. That way you can still keep editing it while hopefully getting the attention that your book deserves. Your book is definitely gonna go far and I promise to do the best I can to help get it out there for people to see! Thank you very much for the amazing read and please keep me updated on any updates because I can't wait to read them!! And to anyone else reading this review definitely go check out Creature of Creation because it is definitely worth the read!


Favorite quotes-

"E1's heart pounded in the base of her throat so fiercely, she wondered if anyone had ever choked on their own heartbeat" 



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