In which an idiot meets another idiot
Or
In which Mista fights alongside his future wife
Mista x Fem!Reader
THIS IS DEFINITELY PART CRACKFIC
Disclaimer: I do not own the plot or the characters. I only own Y/n and certain plot points
Started: 03/12/2...
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Y/n's POV
"I should change your bandage" I told Mista
"No! Stay away from me!" Mista cried. I grabbed him by the ear
"We'll be back!" I said with an innocent smile as I dragged him away
"She's the devil!" Mista cried as I entered his room
"I can walk!" Mista cried as he got up on his own two feet. He walked onto the bed. I closed the door as Loverboy got everything ready
"Relax, I've got this" I said as I unwrapped his wound. It was gushing out blood
"Oh.. I forgot to give you stitches" I said. His eyes became wide
"N-No, I don't need stitches! Leave it alone!" Mista cried
"Oh, relax" I said
"I won't let you!" Mista yelled
"I'll make you a deal" I said. Mista raised an eyebrow
"What kind of deal?" Mista asked suspiciously
"I'm an attractive woman, so clearly I wouldn't be surprised if you were entranced with me. So, I'll be humble and let you make out with me. I'm ju-" I was cut off before I could say I was joking
"Deal!" He yelled. My jaw dropped
"Wait a minute.. do you like me?" I asked
"Yeah, I do" He said completely serious. I felt my heart skip a beat
"Wow, he's dumb enough to fall for me, a total idiot.." I said unaware that I said it
"Huh?" Mista asked
"You didn't hear that.. anyways, time to stitch your wound!" I said changing the subject as I laughed nervously. I put the thread through the needle
"This is gonna hurt!" I said before grabbing a cotton ball and putting disinfectant on it. I applied the cotton ball to his wound. He grit his teeth as I cleaned the wound. I would hate for him to become septic. Once I was done I grabbed the needle
"Now, this is really gonna hurt. Maybe I should give you something to bite down on.." I said setting down the needle. I looked around the room for something I could use to muffle his future screams
"Stay here, I'll be back" I said before leaving. I entered Abbacchio's room and began looking through the drawers. If anyone had a gag, it was him. I opened one of the drawers and found a blindfold
"Perfect!" I said picking it up and walking back to Mista's room. I closed the door behind me
"It's not exactly a gag, but it works" I said as I approached him
"This is kind of kinky.." He said
"You're into it though, so.." I said before gagging him with the blindfold. I picked up the needle
"Remember.. you won't die.." I said. Mista had a determined look on his face before nodding. I pierced his skin with the needle. That determined look faded away instantly. His face paled as I heard his muffled screams. I pulled the thread through and pierced his skin once more. I could hear the pain in his cries but I had to do it. It was for the greater good. I continued to pierce his skin with the needle. Eventually I finished with his stitches. Though, Mista was out cold. The pain was too much, I guess. That's probably why they do this with anesthesia or something
I cleaned up the wound once more and then put gauze over it before wrapping it up. I looked at Mista's now peaceful face. There were tears on his face that were in the process of drying. I almost felt bad for causing him such pain, almost.. okay I did feel bad. I wanted to wipe his tears away but my hands were gross. I got up and left. I entered the bathroom and began to wash my hands
"I gotta survive, I gotta survive, I gotta survive. Staying alive. I gotta survive, gotta survive, I gotta survive. Staying alive. They hate me cause I'm different. Say I'm insignificant. Break me down into pieces. Don't want to see me shine. I gotta survive. They hate to see me grow. They want to see me low. All the way down on the floor. No, no. I gotta survive, gotta survive, gotta survive. Staying alive. I gotta survive, gotta survive, I gotta survive. Staying alive" I sang to myself. It was my own motivation speech that helped me get through the hard times in life
I exited the bathroom and walked back into Mista's room. He was still sleeping
"I might as well take a nap, too" I said as I sat down on the floor and closed my eyes
"Y/n.. come back.." Mista muttered. My eyes opened
"I'm right here" I said as I looked at him. My hand was on the bed when suddenly Mista grabbed it
"Um.. I need my hand" I said trying to break free, yet sleeping Mista had me beat. There was no way I could break free for he was too strong, whilst he was asleep
"Y/n.. stop.. the number four.. ahh!" He yelled. I stood there unamused
"Let me go" I said. He was still fast asleep
How do you wake someone up quickly and efficiently?
I smacked him in the face. His eyes jolted open as he let go of my hand
"Freedom at last!" I said happily
"What the fuck?!" Mista yelled
"You took my hand hostage.. it had to be done" I said. Mista's eyes softened
"I'll let you off this time" He said
"Oh, thank you kind sir for sparing such a damsel, like myself" I said sarcastically. Mista smirked
"You still owe me that make out session" He said
"I was being sarcastic" I said. Mista frowned almost hurt by my words
"Oh, I see.. well then forget it" He said. I felt kind of bad. I mean I did want to make out with him, oh why the fuck not
"Put on deodorant first, and then I'll do it" I said throwing deodorant at him. He grabbed it and quickly put it on. I sighed and approached him. Though my exterior was calm and collected, internally it felt like I had taken 15 stimulants at once. It was all chaos on the inside, though that's how it usually was anyways. I approached Mista as he set down the deodorant
"Listen, if you don't want to.. I'm not gonna make yo-" He got cut off as I put my lips on his. He was shocked but quickly kissed back. It was like electricity coursed through me. I had imagined this so many times in my head, yet it was better than I imagined. He thankfully didn't have chapped lips. Our tongues battled for dominanc- no they fucking didn't that's weird. I felt a hand slither around my waist before pulling me closer. We broke apart as Mista repositioned himself against the wall
"Man, the fuck are you doing? Don't ruin the moment" I said annoyed. Mista raised his eyebrow as his cheeks tinted pink
"Are you gonna sit your ass in my lap or what?" Mista asked. I was caught off guard by his boldness. I quickly sat on his lap before our lips connected once more. This time it was more aggressive. My hand on his chest as we made out
"Y/n.."
"Y/n"
"Y/n! Wake your ass up!" Mista yelled. My eyes opened and the first thing I saw was Mista looking at me. I was in his bed sleeping
"Man fuck off, I was in the middle of a great dream" I said
