In which an idiot meets another idiot
Or
In which Mista fights alongside his future wife
Mista x Fem!Reader
THIS IS DEFINITELY PART CRACKFIC
Disclaimer: I do not own the plot or the characters. I only own Y/n and certain plot points
Started: 03/12/2...
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We were all on a boat. Trish and Bruno were inside the turtle. I was sitting beside Mista with a smile on my face
"You know Mista said he loved me" I said flat out. Mista covered his face
"You can't just say this like that!" Mista cried out. Narancia laughed
"Took you long enough" Fugo said
"You know, what? You confessed your love first!" Mista yelled
"That's because I thought we were going to die" I said as I did a peace sign
"All that matters is that Mista's finally gonna get some pus-" Fugo smacked Narancia
"Don't talk like that" Fugo said
"You wanna start with me?!" Narancia yelled
"I feel like I'm babysitting infants" Abbacchio said
"How long to the destination?" Bucciarati asked from inside the turtle
"We've almost reached Rialto Bridge. About five more minutes" Fugo said
"Okay. Keep going" Bucciarati said
"Bucciarati, what did the Boss say to do?" Giorno asked
"I'm checking the instructions from the Boss again. I'll read it to you. 'The information on this disk was inputted when you boarded the train at Naples. Therefore, I have no way of knowing how many pursuers are left and how many team members you have lost. The information on this disk describes the safest way for me to meet my daughter. It is the final mission. The orders I will give now must be followed to a T, and failure to do so will be unforgivable. If someone acts outside of these orders, even if by accident, I will consider it a threat with malicious intent'" Bucciarati began
"'Now, I will explain the mission. You will now head to the island of San Giorgio Maggiore. Bring my daughter to the top of the bell tower. Once you bring her there, your mission will be over. Directive One. There are no stairs to the bell tower. There is one elevator that goes straight to the top. Only Trish and one bodyguard may ride the elevator. Directive two. The guard may not bring a gun, cell phone, or any personal belongings. Directive three. You must get on the island within 15 minutes of receiving the disk. The disk has a tracking device so I should know where you are. Directive four. All others must remain in the boat and not go on land.' That is all" Bucciarati explained as we made it to the island. Mista docked the boat
"Bucciarati, we have arrived" Giorno told Bucciarati
"So the Boss is at the top of that tower" Narancia said
"Kind of exciting" I said
"The instructions are very detailed. He seems cautious. But that's what it takes to be a mafia boss" Fugo said
"But our mission is over now. The fact that everyone is okay is good" Abbacchio said
"Just barely. Let's have fun in Venice for a few days before going home. I hear the food's great" Mista said
"Venice has good food?" Narancia asked
"We should totally do that" I said
"I just remembered how hungry I am. So what kind of food do they have?" Narancia asked
"Squid ink pasta and crav salad are good. Also, the Cipriani Hotel's carpaccio is exquisite" Mista said
"Ooh, I can't wai-" I was cut off
"You bastards! Don't relax! The mission isn't over yet! Narancia, watch the radar" Bucciarati said after he and Trish came out of the turtle
"Okay" Narancia said
"Bucciarati, I volunteer to be her bodyguard. I will take her to the top of the bell tower" Giorno said
"What are you talking about, asshole? The capo, Bucciarati, is going to take her! You idiot! The Boss didn't know who was still alive. That's why he didn't specify" Abbacchio said as he grabbed Giorno's shoulder. I sighed
"Of course. I will go. Come on, Trish. As ordered, only the two of us will go on land" Bucciarati said before he stepped off of the boat. Trish stood up and followed him. Bucciarati stopped and let Trish pass him. Then, Bucciarati turned to look at us, and he and Giorno made eye contact. It was like they were speaking with just their eyes
"By the way, Giorno, to make sure the mission goes well, would you give me that amulet?" Bucciarati asked referring to one of the ladybug pins on Giorno's jacket
"Ladybugs are considered the sun's bugs. They represent life, right? It's a protective charm, right?" Bucciarati asked
"That's right. Yes, ladybugs bring good luck" Giorno said as he took the pin off. Bucciarati grabbed it and then held it in his hand. Bucciarati put the pin on his jacket
"Bucciarati" Fugo spoke up
"What is it, Fugo?" Bucciarati asked
"I thought this might be a good opportunity to tell you this" Fugo said
"Why are you suddenly so serious?" Bucciarati asked
"I always knew you would become capo someday, and I believe you will complete this mission safely" Fugo said. Abbacchio scoffed and smiled
"Of course" Abbacchio said. We all smiled
"Let's aim to move up further in the organization!" Fugo said
"Yes, that's right. Let's go. Trish" Bucciarati said. Then, the two walked off. We all waited on the boat
"Man, I can't wait to get some food" I said causing Narancia's stomach to growl
"Why would you remind me?!" Narancia cried. Suddenly the Sex Pistols came out
"Mista! Feed us! Feed us!" They cried
"Look what you did, Y/n" Mista complained
"You can't blame me!" I said
"You're the one who brought it up" Mista said
"That's because I was hungry" I said
"You guys are all annoying" Abbacchio muttered. I stuck my tongue out at Abbacchio
"You're being childish" Fugo said
"Mimimimi" I mocked in a nagging voice
"What are you, five?" Mista asked. I turned around and looked at Mista
"Oh, so you're interested in five year olds? That's a whole ass case, my friend" I said as I crossed my arms. Mista's jaw dropped
"What?! Mista likes children?!" Narancia yelled in horror
"The math, isn't mathing" Fugo said
"He just said a sentence that wasn't grammatically correct" Abbacchio said
"Oh my.." Giorno muttered as he face palmed
"I do not like children!" Mista yelled
"Save it for the judge" I said. Mista let out a croaking noise
"Somebody kill me" Abbacchio said. Soon after, we all seemed to quiet down. The mood became serious as we waited for Bucciarati's return. About ten minutes passed when Giorno pulled out a cell phone
"Giorno?" We heard Bucciarati ask
"I thought phones were a no go" I said
"Shh" Narancia told me
"Bucciarati. Yes, I can see his movements already. Thanks to the brooch you put on him, I can see his position. He's at the bottom of the stairs to the crypt. Behind a pillar two meters from the stairs. But wait, Bucciarati! Something unusual is happening!" Giorno explained. Then we heard Bucciarati yell
"There! Take this! Sticky Fingers!" Bucciarati yelled
