AMNESIA - BELLAMY BLAKE

꧁Chapter Five.꧂

❝So far down, Away from the sun

That shines to light the way for me.

To find my way back into the arms

That care about the ones like me.❞

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“Come back to me, Nix. Don't you dare die on me.”

Bellamy fell in step beside of Phoenix, as the army marched with Octavia through the desert. Phoenix tried to ignore the pounding of his own heart, stealing a slight glance in the man's direction. The memory jolted him, confused, he tried to ponder on it. The way it was said, ignoring the headache that was beginning to form. He clenched his eyes shut for a moment, before he opened them. Despondent eyes turned towards the man next to him.

“I.. meant a lot to you, didn't I?” Phoenix mumbled before he could stop himself. The awkwardness was clear in his tone, as Bellamy glanced towards him in surprise. Phoenix chuckled bitterly as Bellamy asked him what had happened, why he can't remember anything. “Abby would be able to tell you that if she were here. All I know is that the ice bath ruined my memories.

“We were friends?” Phoenix asked, though he had a feeling it went deeper than that. The feeling was something he couldn't entirely explain. It was like the man beside of him had been home once, but that was crazy, wasn't it? You don't make homes out of people. At least, Phoenix couldn't remember how that felt.

“Something like that,” Bellamy replied, he tried to hide the pain behind a smile, but Phoenix knew pain like it was the back of his hand. Bellamy wanted to tell Phoenix something, he was sure of it. Bellamy wanted the man beside of him to know how deeply he cared for him, but it was like a switch flipped in his brain and he decided against it. Instead, he glanced at Phoenix. “How'd this happen? I'm not an idiot to not realize they were going to kill me for standing in her way.”

Phoenix shook his head. “Yeah, that bitch in the red dress stole my memories, and now I'm a follower of another bitch in red. Kinda funny how it all comes into a circle, isn't it?” Phoenix couldn't stop himself from chuckling. “No offense, Bellamy, but I can't talk about what went on down there. I can tell you that the change happened fourty six days in. It was fine. Until it wasn't.”

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“We honor those who died so we might live,” The group stopped at nightfall to camp for the night. Phoenix sat in between Kara and Indra, the red Queen getting ready for them to share their rations. “Omon gon oson.” Phoenix repeated the phrase as he was handed a piece of the rations. (All of me for all of us.)

Phoenix closed his eyes briefly. He remembered them all, the ones who died in the bunker. He couldn't get their faces out of his head. No matter how hard he tried. He wondered if it would be like this forever, some day the war had to end, right? He opened his eyes with a breath, placing the food against his lips, taking a quick bite.

“Your brother loves you, Octavia,” Indra broke the silence, her eyes having glanced at Bellamy before they fell on Octavia again.

“Love is weakness,” Octavia replied. Phoenix disagreed but he stayed quiet.

“Gaia’s teachings, no doubt,” Indra said. “I hoped she was beyond such nonsense.”

“It isn't nonsense,” Octavia disagreed, her eyes staring straight ahead at the flames of the campfire. “Love no one... And no one can hurt you.” indra told her she loved her, asking if that made her weak, surprising Phoenix, but Octavia looked at her shaking her head. “I would never say that to you, Seda.” (teacher.)

They didn't have much time to dwell on Octavia's words, screams coming from the scouts erupted into the night air. Miller screamed for a medic. He couldn't tell them if they were under attack, having no idea what happened. Phoenix raced forward with the others, Clarke having went back to get the med kit. Obinka’s screams of pain as he thrashed around on the ground filled Phoenix's ears. His heart pounded in his chest as he crouched down beside of him.

“Let me through, I can help him!” Clarke shouted, Kara placing a arm out to keep Clarke back by telling her not her. Octavia stood watching as Obinka thrashed around screaming, before he stilled. “Octavia!” Clarke forced out, bringing Octavia back to reality. The red queen telling Kara to let Clarke through.

Clarke crouched down beside of Phoenix, her hand going to Obinka’s neck to find a pulse. “He's alive, but his hearts racing..” Clarke informed Octavia, who had knelt down on the other side of Phoenix.

“What the hell is going on?” Phoenix asked, his own heart racing as he looked at Obinka’s still frame. Octavia turned her gaze on Miler as soon as the question left Phoenix's lips.

Miller explained in a panic, his voice loud, as he told them they had separated to cover more ground. All of a sudden, he had heard Obinka scream out that they were everywhere. His voice grew louder with hysteria as he explained that when he got there, there had been nothing, just Obinka’s screaming. Phoenix reeled back in shock as a writhing thing poked through Obinka’s skin.

Phoenix panted as he helped carry Obinka inside the tent, Miller shouting orders while Clarke told them nobody else should come inside the tent. While the others were too busy arguing whether or not it came from the food, Phoenix was busy studying the man on the table. With Bellamy's help, he moved Obinka’s pant leg up. Disgusted at the hole in his leg, Phoenix cleared his throat to get their attention.

“It came from the sand,” Clarke realized as she focused her level gaze on Octavia. “We have to go back.”

“What? No,” Octavia stated, Phoenix sending her an incredulous look. He may not remember Clarke, but it was clear she had the better leadership skills.

“He told Miller that they were everywhere."

Kara went on to say how everywhere could have meant everywhere inside of him, but Phoenix was sick of this. He turned toward Octavia. “If we do this, we're risking everyone's life. You've trusted me for the past six years. Trust me now.”

Octavia's gaze focused on Phoenix, but it was like she wasn't willing to listen. She turned toward them all. “We march at first light.”

“And Obinka?” Miller question.

“If he's not better by then... I'll end his suffering myself.”