𝐃𝐨 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐌𝐞? ꨄ 𝗔𝘀𝗵𝘁𝗿𝗮𝘆

0.4

⇢VIENNA⇠

3 weeks. I haven't gone to 5th period or seen Ashtray or Fez in 3 whole weeks. He stopped texting after 1 and a half.

I mean I'm not failing the class. I have this girl let me borrow her notes and I make up the tests after school.

The teacher's really cool. Within those 3 weeks ma and Nairobi started sitting with my sister at lunch. Because she's not blind, she catches me looking at Ashtray once and it's downhill from there, and I need that, a reason not to look for him.

Because everything in me misses him.

"So you're basically in a long distance relationship?" Maddy asked Cassie. They were talking about this thing between her and Nairobi's older brother.

"No we like facetime every night." "Aww so sweet, you guys are falling in love." BB smiled. "Oh my god, stop."

Now Nairobi didn't have anything against Cassie, she really liked her. But that was before she started dating her brother. McKay is really into Cassie.

But you can't step foot into East Highland Highschool without hearing about the kind of girl Cassie Howard is.

No shame in her game, I love Cassie and all...but she's a slut.

"We are not in love, but he did invite me to spend the weekend with him." "Like the whole weekend?" "Yeah."

"How much longer are the two of you gonna pretend like the other doesn't exist?" Nairobi spoke, pulling me over into our own conversation and lowering her voice.

"You clearly miss him." "Yeah well that doesn't mean I have to put up with the shitty way he makes me feel. All i've ever been was honest and upfront about how I feel. He takes me as a joke. And me. I'm anything but." "They broke up... Like two days after the pep rally."

"Oh...good for them I guess." "V. You and Ash have something. A weird connection no one not even myself could ever understand. He's a boy, he's dumb. And what he did was a typical dumb boy thing because he was jealous and wanted your attention. Because that's all he's ever wanted... You..."

"Hey, do any of you know how bitcoin works?" Kat asks. "No," Maddy answers. "But you know who might. Fez and Ash."

I skipped school for the next 3 days.

Day 1 I moped.

Day 2 ... I also moped.

But day 3 I procrastinated, a LOT.

I couldn't talk to Maddy because she was out with Nate. And I wanted another opinion other than Ni's. So I called Rue.

"Thank god you called me, I was so bored. What's up V?" "I need your opinion on a serious topic." "...Okay...Hit me." "Have you ever been in love, Rue?" "No..."

"Ok yeah love is a strong word, let me put it like this." I sighed, getting more comfortable in my bed.

"Have you ever had such strong feelings for someone It hurts, because you can't express them the way you want. Where they consume your every thought and you just crave to be around them all the time. And you just feel empty when you can't. I guess what I'm saying is, have you ever felt this feeling that felt like love but you aren't really sure because you don't know what love feels like."

"...Yeah. I have. But I can't have them because they feel all that for someone else... But ugh... This about you and Ash right." Rue stifled through the phone.

"Yeah... we've been in a really bad place these last couple of weeks. We're both to stubborn for our own good. And I don't know if it's so bad that we can't fix it.  Communication is not out strong suit. It's scary you know, to you know completely give myself over to someone like that, but he makes me feel safe and being with him feels like home. I don't know- I don't know how to explain it really and I know it's weird because we're living two completely different lives. But I feel so lost without him, but at the same beginning together could do more harm than good."

"I remember the first day I introduced you to Ash and Fez. When you saw Ash you're eyes lit up. It was like you planned your whole future out with him before even saying hi. Your eyes still do that, you know, they sparkle every time you see him, hear his name. And when he sees you, this calm and happy look washes over his face, which isn't usually there. I think you love him. And that scares you. Because you're so young and you know you want him for the rest of your life. And trust me Ash can't stay mad at you. The second you call he'll come running. It's gonna take some time for him to understand that you're serious and that you're not going anywhere. But just follow your heart, you know."

"...Thanks Rue Rue." "Hey V. Could you do me a favor?" "Anything." "Could you stay on the phone with me until I fall asleep?" "Of course." "Night V." "Night Rue."

Going back to school on Monday I decided to start with baby steps. "I just had this really deep conversation with Rue the other night and so I'm gonna start going to 5 period."

"I- what did she say that I didn't." "Nothing really, she just gave me a different perspective." "Are we going to the carnival on Saturday, right?" "Totally." "You'll never guess what happened. McKay told Cassie he loved her."

"Bro what? Didn't see that one coming." "I know. I gotta go But good luck, ok. You've got this. You two are made for each or whatever." Ni hugged me leaving.

The school day dragged on painfully slow. Walking into 5th period my eyes admitly went to him. He was looking down at his phone. Seeing him felt refreshing.

So refreshing a sigh slipped out my lips. It took all of 10 seconds for him to look up at me.

And when he did... I saw the look Rue was talking about.

Looking away I took a seat in the front of the classroom.

Baby steps.

And plus I need to process how to tell him everything I want to.

‼️a/n‼️

HELLLLPPPPP

ok look, i don't want to sexualize javon as he is underage but i have already planned out this super cute and passionate way V loses her virginity to Ash

and I want to go into detail because that's where the word cute comes in

but at the same time i don't want to be attacked for doing so ik u guys would love it especially u horny mo fos but i'm in a pickle

i might just end up doing it bc it'll be a really big part in Ash trusting V and showing his more softer side