Stumbling Steps

19| ly is kev's world

KEVIN:

"Why do you look so lost?" Ly poked me in my ribs and didn't this seem like deja vu but reversed.

"I am not lost,"

"Kev just don't kill us on our way back," Maya chimed in from the back scanning through the photos she took. Daris was boring holes in my head from the back, I could feel that.

The ride back home was silent. The other three were tired but I was dazed. I saw Ly scrutinising me, trying to understand why I was so quiet but said nothing and I was thankful for it. I didn't know what was wrong with me. Why was my mind a mess and why did I suddenly feel like Ly had hugged me for the first time, all over again? I couldn't even avoid her like before. That time I had a reason to avoid it but now I have none.

Ly remained quiet until we dropped Daris and Maya home but the second they were out she asked me the question I dreaded.

"Kev, what's wrong?"

"Absolutely nothing," I said, shrugging a little.

"Kev, when did we start lying to each other?"

"Ever since we couldn't formulate an answer to the question we are asked," I glanced at her and then back at the road. Dazed or not, I really didn't want to be in an accident, especially when Ly was with me.

"Whatever is bugging you Kev I hope you figure it out and if you need my help, you know I am always there for you," That was the problem. I couldn't ask her. I can not ask her about my feelings for her. Were they platonic or were they more than that?

I guess that was the biggest issue when friends become lovers. Confusion. Whether they saw each other as friends or more than that and I think when friends turn into lovers, everyone knows it before the people involved get to know.

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Too much to ask for a good night's sleep on the first day of winter break. I had a good plan of sleeping for a long time in the morning but nothing ever went my way whenever I thought about a good sleep. This time, Daris had planted a weird thought in my mind and my neurons, my precious neurons were going crazy sending transmissions everywhere. No sooner than later, I would start feeling the shocks.

I decided to disturb the one person's sleep who had kept me awake for the whole night now. Picking up my phone, I quickly dialled Daris's number and after ringing for a long time he picked up the phone.

"Are you sleeping?"

"I was Kevin, I was," His voice was laced with sleep and for a moment there I regretted disturbing him.

"Oh! You can get back to sleep then,"

"You called me at 4:27 in the morning, woke me up to tell me that I should go back to sleep? Nah dude, I am too curious now to go back to sleep,"

"I had some questions,"

"Do you realize that this is the first time we are talking on call? Also I don't think that those questions are about basketball. If they were, you could have dropped me a text like previous times,"

"You are not as shy as I thought you were,"

"Do I give shy vibes?"

"Why did you say that I look at Ly like she's my world?"

"Because you do look at her like that,"

"I look at everyone like that. I even look at Maya like that,"

"You don't and don't think about looking at Maya like that. Kevin, you know who do you hang out with the most? Blake,"

"I hang out with everyone. I am friends with whole school,"