It was my first day with antibiotics. I stared at the pill laying on the counter. Karl was beside me. I grabbed it. I put it in my mouth and swallowed it. After a minute or two. I threw it up. I had a water with me just in case it happened. I huffed. I was angry. I looked at myself in my mirror. I could see my ribs barely. I wanted to cry. Karl was beside me still. He went and got me another water. I stared at myself again. I popped my knuckles and slammed a punch right in the mirror multiple times until my hands were bleeding and the glass was broken. Karl came rushing in. I was staring at my hands as they were dripping blood in the sink. The red stuff amused me. Karl grabbed my hands causing me to wince at the pain. It burned terribly. Karl bandaged my hands.
4 weeks later My mental health was way down my motivation for anything was down. I hadn't been outside in the last weeks. The only thing I had been doing was crying and making music. I was getting tired of life. I wanted to end it really. That exact thought was on my mind every day. Until one day I made a choice.
I was sitting on my bed. I was setting up my fake death. I took a breath in.
"XD! Come here!" I shouted
I waited a second and there he appeared. He had a glow up. He looked way better than before.
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In his scratchy voice he spoke.
"What is it Y/n?" He asked
"Look it may seem crazy but I need your help to fake my death." I said staring him in the eyes.
"I can't do that." He said
"Why not!" I yelled
"All the people it would affect." He said
"Xd please. I can't go in with life like this. I have nothing to lose." I said
"You have everything to lose Y/n!" He said
"Xd...please. I have a eating disorder I'm getting thinner by the second. My mental health is low. Nobody would care really. I want to go off. All I am in this world is a problem for everyone." I said
"Y/n your probably one of my best friends. I can't lie to people and tell them your dead when I know the truth. Everyone would care you mean the world to lots of people in this world. You have a daughter. You have a cousin. You have a brother. You have a father. You have a nephew. Your gonna lose that all?" He asked
"It's my last option..." I said feeling tears prickle at my eyes
" I have a friend who can help you. He lives in the depths of the nether. He can help you with your situation." He said
"Thank you so much!" I said running to hug Xd.
He flinched but hugged back. He also smelt like lemon which was weird.
"If there is anything you want to give to people before you "die" I'll give it to them." He said releasing from the hug.
"Okay. I have a Will {when you die} and a few songs to publish. I guess I could right letters to each." I said sitting down and thinking.
" Okay before we go through with this. Are you certain you wanna do this ?" He asked
