Make me feel

9- distractions

After leo dropped me off I entered the house quietly hoping my brother was asleep, the car ride was awkward to say the least. It's just that I wasn't expecting the kiss, it was my first kiss too. I just would've preferred if he had asked. Maybe I overreacted.

It was good tho. Really good

I wonder if he has kissed other people before, he probably has since he's really attractive.

I have had chances to kiss other guys but I reject them, romantic things like that I don't want them to be with just anybody. I wanna like the person and get comfortable first.

It was different with Leo tho, I didn't feel uncomfortable or like it was wrong, it felt right. How do I know if I like him? I met him a week ago and I already stayed at his house, he saw me crying and I met his friends. Everything feels like it's going too fast and I don't like it.

I also don't want him to think that I regret it, because I don't. I just want some time to think and get my feelings right.

The look on his face when I pulled away made me want to kiss him all over again, he looked so sad I feel bad.

I know I shouldn't but still-

It looks like my brother isn't home, he left me a bunch of messages since I left the house. We rarely fight, gray has this tendency of acting like i'm still a little girl and it pisses me off.

He made a comment saying i'm immature and I don't know how the real world works, ok maybe i'm immature sometimes but that gives him no right to try and make decisions for me all the time when i'm completely able to do them myself.

I know he's my older brother and he's just trying to protect me but it's exhausting having him breathing down my back.

The fact I ran away made me look more immature but- I wasn't really thinking

my phone dings letting me know I got a notification, I check it and it's Leo. My heart starts beating faster as I enter the message.

' Good night princess, i'm so sorry I kissed you without making sure you were okay with it first, my intention wasn't to make you uncomfortable so i'm sorry I made you feel that way. I understand if you don't wanna keep talking to me.'

Do I leave him on read? no that's mean, but I also don't wanna show him I care already. He's so nice I don't wanna be rude

' Good night leo, don't worry about it :)' good enough I guess..

I'm not even mad with him but I don't wanna make it seem like everything is alright already, you know? I want him to feel bad, just a little

I turn off my phone and get ready for bed, exhaustion feeling my body.
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Knocks sound through my door waking me up, I sit up slowly rubbing my eyes and go to open my door.

Gray stands there with his arms crossed and one of his eyebrows raised. I smile awkwardly and look down when his stare doesn't soften.

'Why didn't you tell me you were back?' he says in a stern voice making me a little bit more nervous than I already was.

'It was late and you weren't here I didn't want to bother you i'm sorry, besides leo dropped me off I was safe' I say hoping he will let it go,

he sighs and runs his hand through his face, he usually does that when he wants to say something so I just wait for him to talk.

'I'm sorry I said those things to you, I have basically raised you your whole life and it's hard for me to accept you're growing up and i'm sorry, I love you I don't want you to feel like I baby you'
He confesses in a softer tone,

I wrap my hands around his waist and press my face against his chest 'I love you Gray i'm sorry for scaring you' he lets out a heavy sigh and hugs me back as he pats my hair.

'Get ready we're going to the beach' he says and I quickly look at him and he has a smile on his face knowing how much I love the beach, I let out a screech and push him out of my room so that I can get ready

he chuckles as I close the door on his face

I go towards my bathroom and shower, I start getting ready and looking for the new bikini I bought the other day

It's lavender with a little white ruffle at the top, it's really cute. I paired it with a white open button up and some shorts.

I let my hair down and clip some strands with a clip.

After making sure I have everything ready I grab my phone and rush downstairs waiting for Gray, I swear he spends like two hours in the shower and then another hour getting ready.

He swears he doesn't, like really?

I wait patiently for another 15 minutes and he still isn't done, I go upstairs and start pounding oh his door, I hear him scream telling me to shut up, my lips pout and I roll my eyes and shout at him to hurry up or i'm walking to the beach.

I go back downstairs and grab my phone, there's a message from leo he sent an hour ago

oops I didn't see it I will just answer him later

I turn off my phone off and go to the car and wait for Gray inside the car. I turn the radio on and lean against the window.

Gray enters the car and I roll my eyes at him. He just shrugs and laughs it off. We get to the beach after 20 minutes of my ears bleeding thanks to his marvelous singing.

We grab our things and head out the car, the sun is beaming, my eyes squint as I smile and go sit close to a palm tree, shielding me from the sun.

Just what I needed.