Forever Loved (Twilight Fanfiction)

Mato

(Mato when he found Ammie outside of his house when she returned for Koda after her being gone for several years following her bio father's attack)

I was glad that Seth had agreed to be the one to drive me- unlike Uncle Sam and Aunty Emily, he didn't hover. He had dropped me off in front of the house, telling me he was pulling a few houses away to park in front of the little pond. 

He knew how much I hated to be back here. He would give me the privacy I needed.

It wasn't until Seth had pulled away, until I knew that he couldn't see my hesitance, that I turned back to the house. The house I had grown up in. The house that I hated.

After several moments of building up my courage- grateful that I was alone, and for once didn't have to straighten up and puff up my chest for the sake of my brothers- I shoved the key into the front door.

The same front door that my Mother had shoved me into once, after a particularly long night of drinking. It had hurt. But at least it was me, and not one of the little kids. I could take it.

Inside the house, the air was just as cold as outside. Nobody had paid the bills. There were no lights, no electricity, not even safe drinking water. Mold and rust built near the sink and shower.

My Mother wasn't here, though. She so rarely was. Especially on weekends. There were several deals and specials over at the casino on Stratton.

Get the horse and leave. Get the horse and leave.

I passed by the hole in the wall from when one of my Mother's fleeting boyfriends had shoved her into it. Or maybe that one was from when he had punched it. And the bathroom doorframe that had been ripped off as he tried to yank the door open as I locked myself and my younger brothers inside. Luckily we had made it out the window before he succeeded.

My Mother's bedroom door was closed. I didn't reach for the doorknob- I knew that there would be empty bottles and syringes in there. The kids never went in there. She wouldn't let them, and neither would I.

At the very end of the hall was the tiny room- the one that had once somehow housed so many boys. The mattresses were all still on the ground- I had shared with my youngest two brothers. But the horse wasn't there.

With the room bare now- all of the books and backpacks and clothes had been thrown out into the mud by my mother in her fit of rage- it was easy enough to spot the faded patch of brown as I neared the closet.

Ah- I should have known. I would have known, had I allowed myself to think of that day.

My Mother, coming home screaming and raging at 3 am. Her grabbing up my youngest brother, dragging him out of our bed. The metal rod, hitting him over and over and over as he clutched his stuffed horse- the horse that had once been mine- and screamed my name.

The blackness of rage as I saw my Mother whipping him, the stripes of blood across his back and chest and legs. I hadn't even felt the trembling. I hadn't felt myself shift into wolf-form, or noticed when I launched at my Mother, pinning her to the floor. My focus had been on my younger brother- watching as my next two oldest brothers had scrambled around me, yanking up the crying toddler and bolting for the door.

I hadn't hurt our Mother- I should have. I wanted to. But the boys had needed me. So I had shoved away from her, turning back into my human form and yanking the metal rod from my Mother's hand, throwing it across the room.

My eyes stayed fixed on the stuffed horse in my hands, refusing to look towards the rod as I angrily swiped at the traitorous tear that fell. I didn't know where she had gotten it- it was similar to a blind wand, but I had never seen one made of metal rather than plastic.