ayaka

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diary entry #55

i'm always shy around them, im not sure what it even is. is it love? im sure it is. i invited them to go skiing this week and i had so much fun. i cant even meet them without rumors stirring up. as the shirasagi himegimi, i cant risk my reputation going down but for them... i just might. i wish they'd smile for me... me only. maybe... i should ask to see them again. i'll wear a pretty dress and meet up with them and see if maybe, just maybe they'd return my feelings. maybe i could buy them some sweets too. just maybe?

diary entry #65

i cant help it anymore. i want them to myself! i dont mind my reputation going down. i just want to be with the one i love! i wonder if i could make them smile, smile so preciously. its a waste to be embarassed in front of them but i love them!

diary entry #71

... they like my brother. it's going to be so awkward between us now. ugh why did i even say that i liked them?! i should have kept it to myself. well, im happy for my brother. i am writing this with my red eyeshadow streaming down my face onto the dress they bought me. im sorry but i want them to like me.. not my brother.

~

poor ayaka struggles

edit! this chapter was inspired by the song TOKIMEKI of winter by cinnamons & evening cinema
(great song btw)

double update and ok bye

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