S2 Ch 6: Museum

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At the museum

Negan, simmons, jaune, yang, ruby snd Neptune exit the vehicles as dropkick sits on Bumblebees hood

Negan: smithsonian air and space museum. Land of dreams in there

Simmons: all i ever wanted to be was an astronaut

Simmons rips his pants off to reveal sector seven underwear as jaune covers rubys eyes

Jaune: what is that?!

Ruby: what can i see?

Yang: no!

Simmons: what? I wear them when I'm in a funk. So does giambi, jeter. It's a baseball thing. Okay watches synchronized, sharp mind and empty bladder. You get caught demand an attorney and don't ever say my name. Okay, take one of those pills. Slip it under your tongue. It's high concentrate polymer they put in oreo cookies. Okay now let's get this show on the road

Simmons pulls out a taser

Neptune: woah woah woah listen, i can't do this. Yeah I'm not some alien bounty hunter, guys. I'm not gonna do this. Guards have guns and i don't wanna ruin my huntsman record

Dropkick: pussy....

Simmons: kid kid kid kid you compromise this mission, you are dead to me. Now look into my eyes and tighten up that sphincter

In the museum

Neptune walks out of the bathroom

Neptune: (whistles) yo, baba! bad news bro! Ran out of toilet paper! Please tell me you got any

Security guard 1: sir! I suggest you get in there. The museum is closed!

Neptune: i understand that but as you can see, this is important Allright? Thumper dumper. I got to go. All right

Guard 1: sir your a grown naked ass man around children. Pull your pants up and exit the building!

Neptune: i ain't going anywhere bro

In a hallway a security guard walks out of the elevator and walks past 3 statues to be pulled back and tazed by Simmons

In the bathroom

Neptune: you got that paper, right sir?

Security guard 5: you should be embarrassed this a family museum, sir

The security guard hands the toilet paper over and inti the stall with his hand as Neptune tazes the security guard to here him fall and exit the bathroom stall to sew the security guard on the ground as he trips tazing him and the security guard for him to squeal as he falls next to the security guard for Simmons to bust through the door into the bathroom

Simmons: what's going on in here?

Neptune: hOw times cAn YoU geT Tased iN thE NuTs beFOR yOu can't HaVe Kids? Do YoU kNoW?

Simmons drags Neptune out as Negan, ruby, jaune and yang run in as the cameras power down for Negan to sit a box down, to open it and grabs dropkicks head

Simmons: just downed five guards! Five guards! Get your stuff and get outta here!

Negan: give us a second

Jaune pulls out a allspark shard

Ruby: where'd you get that?

Jaune: wheeljack gave it to me incase we found any tired transformers

Yang: why can't we use the allspark to revive iron?

Negan: the autobots tried that I'm sure. Or else they could have ground bridged to us

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