The words I didn't say || poetry

summer is coming

I think back to when
my thighs stuck to the plastic chairs,
and when my cheeks would turn pink
from being out in the sun too long.
I also remember when you would come over any day because we didn't have school,
or when we ran to the gas station to get slushy's when the sun was setting.
Or when we almost got kicked out of the movie theater because we couldn't shut up.
Why is it so easy to remember the good things when you did me so wrong?
Why is it so easy to forget all the negative and hurtful words you said to me?
I miss not feeling like this,
carrying the weight of what I did to myself
on my shoulders.
Wishing I had never met you,
and wishing it didn't end like this.
Hoping it will go back to way it was,
when I didn't sit by myself at lunch,
or when I wasn't a liar in your eyes.
Summer was reliving before you.
It will be relieving after you too.

-L