I Forget my last love

05-03-2022 : Hello my only friend!!

He caught me...

He literally almost caught me...

I was so closed...I still got goosebumps if I think about that scene...

But firstly...

Let me tell you how I start my morning.

By having a upset stomach.WOW!! RIGHT?

And guess what...??

That special person is none other than one of our mutual friend...I know because she was there at our wedding.

Rossie

She is really sweet and when I talked to her I didn't feel like I didn't know her. It feels I know her from very long time.

We talked a lot about our relation with each other before I lost my memory.

She even told me to see a doctor because I look really pale.

I don't know...and I asked her about that room if she know...

You wouldn't believe what she said...she told me that that room has my past.

But she also warned me to never try to find that truth.

It was weird but it could be their concern but why...

WHY!?

When she took her leave I start my that little mission to find the key of that room.

First, I start searching his wardrobe, but I think fate is not with me...

I didn't knew he will come early and without his car.

He directly enter the house from main gate and I didn't have the time to hide aur arrange everything again in his cupboard.

I didn't knew what to do....

But...

When he open the door of our room , his eyes directly catch the messy cupboard.

When he came near the cupboard I was still there behind it's door with something in my hand.

When he look behind the door he saw me with his hoodie...

Yeah, I couldn't find that key.

He asked me what am I doing there...

I told him I was just missing him that's why I am finding his hoodie...

For few seconds he looked at me like I am lieing, but I think he believed me.

He engulfed me in his arms within a blink of eyes.

At first I was little flinched but relaxed within a second.

I think I really missed him.

From Few days...I think distance myself with him, I doesn't even trust him, or believe him.

I am feeling alone here...like there is no one for me...

And that frustrate me....

And you know what....I hate this...

I want the truth...

But I think tomorrow, first thing I should do was go to a doctor, I am feeling really weird.

I doesn't even wanna eat anything.

Even Denial asked me on the dinner table why I am not eating anything.

I just said I doesn't have a appetite.

But I think I shouldn't like to him, he is doing too much for me.

And it's breaking my heart,

He is taking care of me like a soft feather that shouldn't get hurt.

But he doesn't know he is still hurting me by hiding the truth.

Rossie could be right about not asking about my past and about that room.

But I don't care, if that room had something tragic I am ready to see.

Whatever it is...

I wanna see it...

And rethink about the thought of marrying Denial.

Because somewhere I think I was happy while marrying him.

He is a really nice guy and I doesn't wanna broke his trust.

But I have whole rights to know about myself...

my memory....

My past...and

about him...

And yeah...I am not going to find that stupid key ....

I will break that stupid door who is irritating me till now...

Let's just sleep and I am ready for the tomorrow...

Whatever it is I will accept whether to choose to keep on living with Denial or find him...

It will be my choice...

Only mine...

Just mine...

Goodnight to you...

to me...

to denial...

To him...

~~~~~