State of Grace | ONGOING

Chapter 14

TW: Homophobia

Sitting next to the boyfriend you cheated on the night before at brunch with your parents sounds like a nightmare. Unfortunately for me, it was about to be my reality.

I drove down the street to pick up Bo, a pair of darkly tinted sunglasses sitting on the bridge of my nose to block the bright sunlight streaming into the car from all sides. I had one of the worst hangovers of my life, and no amount of water or frozen pizza last night had helped to soak up the liquor and regret. I'd popped an obscene amount of Advil before leaving my house but I could feel my brain pulsing into my skull. And no amount of painkillers could erase the foggy memory I had of Theo's hands on me, of her lips hot and demanding against mine.

I honked the horn as I pulled up to the curb outside of Bo's house, then winced when the sound set off a fresh wave of pain in my head.

"Mon dieu," I groaned to myself in the safety of my car. All I was going to be able to handle at brunch was water and some fruit. Or a breakfast burger. No in between.

Bo opened the passenger side door, slipping into the seat next to me and slamming the door shut, causing me to groan again. "Don't do that," I whined, pressing one hand to my forehead and grabbing the bottle of water in my cup holder to take a long sip as if that would somehow clear the pounding in my head.

"Oh, you're hungover?" He asked sarcastically, very clearly aware that I was. My sunglasses alone were enough indication, but he knew I'd left the party sick, so he was being obtuse on purpose.

"Obviously," I deadpanned, pushing my sunglasses up on my head so he could see the bags under my eyes.

"Shit, you look awful," he quipped, and I dropped my sunglasses down again, ignoring Theo's echoing words in my head. He doesn't deserve you.

"Thanks," I retorted, putting my car in drive and pulling out into the street again.

"You ruined last night for me," Bo lectured, and I had to fight back the overwhelming urge to laugh at that. He had no clue. "You just disappeared and I had to hear from Sunny that you went home sick. The boys were on me about not fucking taking care of you and shit, like it's my job."

This was the side of Bo that I couldn't stand. He cared more about his friends' opinions of him than he did about actually doing the kind thing. He wasn't interested in expanding his mind to be more accepting as long as the guys on his team continued to be close-minded. He didn't care about putting in any work behind the scenes. He only wanted to look like a good boyfriend when they teased him for it, but he was just as fast to ignore me if they said he spent too much time with me. I'd almost broken up with him over it last year. He'd sworn that he wouldn't do it anymore, but here he was.

"I'm sorry, bub, but I couldn't even see straight let alone text you," I pointed out, the innuendo unintended and certainly missed by him.. I was once again letting his shitty comments slide because I didn't want this to be a fight. Especially when I knew that I had done worse things in the last twenty four hours that I wasn't ready for him to find out about.

He leaned over when I stopped at a red light and kissed the side of my head. "I forgive you," he told me magnanimously. He was always like that, at my throat for something one instant and generous with his forgiveness the next, even when he should have been apologizing too. Not that I called him out for much, so he didn't even know what he did that I wished he would apologize for. "I'm looking forward to seeing your parents," he added, changing the subject completely.

"Me too," I said, and it wasn't a lie. I was anxious, of course, since they tended to make me feel insecure without even meaning to, and after kissing a girl for the first time last night, I was downright nauseous just thinking about them mentioning politics or sexuality. Or maybe that was just from the hangover and guilt? It was hard to tell anymore. But at the end of the day, they were my parents and I loved them, even when I didn't always like them. I knew brunch would be nice and then they'd be heading back to Portland and I wouldn't see them again until Thanksgiving so I had to make the most out of this meal because I'd probably miss them again in a few weeks.