What... Was It? (A Bedtime Story)

WAS

Was there hope?

If I think of it as though hope is in my grasp, and all I can't figure out is where to put it, is that hope?

"Sunni..."

Death visited her first.

I dialed the police hotline, and calmly informed them how she was leaning too much on the top rail of her dining chair that her neck had bent back til her lifeless eyes faced the faded ceiling. I told them how her mouth hang open with bubbles drooling on the side, and whether I knew what happened before I saw her like that.

I said I didn't.

Although, I might have known this will come to one of us. Memories played in my mind like an old film. We exchanged thoughts, letting each other know we both think these minds of ours were hopeless.

Between us, it wasn't 'at least we have each other.' for we're the least type of friends someone could lean on, but it was 'happy with you for now.'

...so I knew it'd end.

Even expected it to happen unexpectedly.

I heard the sirens and multiple voices. I don't know what else came after that, but only saw the world stuck in that very moment.

"Ma'am."

If I was shocked by Sunni, it was delayed. If the undying scream was from déja vu brought by a single word, it hit on spot.

"Ma'am, please, calm down."

I wanted to, but I couldn't stop my mouth. I crumpled my ears shut in hopes to ignore everything, only to realize, that's all I did.

The screaming halted abruptly with my lips far apart.

Panting, I looked up to a person.

"Please? Can she live once more?" My voice came out struggling.

He placed a blanket over me and said, "She will live a life of everlasting happiness. No more temporaries."

I cried, wept like a child.

Sunni's tiny apartment was busy, and I had nothing understood, except what he said. I might have been suffering with world's impermanence.

Constantly thinking what changes in a second I blink my eyes.

Do I try or do I die?