Yutika- A Review Shop

✿A Whole New World✿

IcecreamSundae5 

Chapters read: 13

Title: 4/10

The title is apt for the story, very apt might I say. But at the same time , a very common choice too.

By common I usually mean that I searched on the Wattpad search bar and the results were way too many. In your case, I had a book with the same name for judging in an award.

That's why I would ask you to change it.

Your new title can be "Mocking the Clichés" or something like that? Because your book seemed like a response to all the bad boy and popular boy things floating all over the internet.

Cover: 5/10

The vectors are good. But when I say the background, it is messed up real time.

White outlines around the vectors don't look convincing at all. The black cubes in the background also messed the cover making it chaotic. The font of the title is not appealing too.

What I really liked was characters having mint chocolate and chocolate ice creams with them.

I would suggest you to very much change the cover, although you should keep the same vectors on the new one.

Blurb: 9/10

Believe me when I say that it is a very good score for the blurb. And none has gotten this high score by a sensible me ever.

When you described Olive, I was like, yeah another cliché book to read. But, that wild turn of Zee Thompson baffled me for good.

How did you even think of this? And your way of delivering was also to the point.

However, there are minor grammatical errors which you can correct if you look at the blurb closely.

Plot: 9.5/15

Believe me when I say that had I read only starting 8 chapters around, you would have got a solid 14 from me. What went bad after that?

Either I require a good description to hold on a book or engaging characters at best. You didn't write worthy descriptions. However, your character Zee was a queen in my eyes, she still is. Nick was also a quite loveable character and kept the story engaging and balanced. First chapters introduced them well.

But you can't carry everything with just the same plot and negligibly any major changes. We see side appearances of Sara, Zack and Olive. Where was James all the time? We just have a small line with him in the English class.

Nick is seen juggling between idolizing Zee and berating himself for thinking such for her continuously. Zee's thoughts are not clear and in her point of views, we don't get much of her 'romantic' feelings towards Nick and then suddenly she realises that Nick is playing with her heart and so decides to kiss him.

At this point the character arc becomes repetitive and descriptions aren't helping too, which becomes boring to read.

Flow and Pace: 9/15

Again at the starting, we have the best of flow and pace. The pace of the story was smooth and the subplots flowed perfectly from one to other.

But gradually, things started to get dull. The pace of the story still seemed fine, however I could buy some descriptions in the later chapters.

However, descriptions at points as Zee's accident, her feeling dull due to Nick's outburst at the club etc could have been elaborated. It just looked that an incident was being told by second person to third person in brief with no emotions whatsoever.

As for flow, things stopped flowing smoothly from one to another. Things started becoming awkward between the two. Let me explain it better in the CD section.

Character Development: 9.5/10

First of all, hands down everyone.

Zee is a queen. She is sarcastic, she is caring, she is the perfect clumsy and lazy teen and the most of all, she is relatable.

She stood there for Sara, Zack (crush), Nick (everytime) and also decided to change Olive for good who she hated with a passion. There is not a more golden character than her. Full marks for this character.

Sara is a doting mother and a friend. At first when we got to know that she wants to invite Zee, I thought she is just money minded lady who thinks her neighbour to be bank account. However, her character progressed, slowly and gradually to be a really good one.

One thing I would say however, she seems mature enough to not to drag Zee into her problems with foul mood. No, this isn't Sara to even unknowingly kinda use Zee as a support when they are not that much acquainted like for months and she can maybe tell Nick before.

Nick, okay I have some problems with the development of this character. He doesn't seem like a total introvert at the starting. He doesn't give one percent bad boy vibes which he should (in the starting) for the whole school to call him that. Obviously not everyone is blind to consider Nick to be the bad boy when he is actually socially awkward?

His characters started to seem unreal when his conversations started to look forced. Like the one before their hug. The dialogues didn't make sense sometimes and everything happened in a blink of the eye (a bit of pace problem). Disruption in his character started to break the flow and hampered Zee's character in that particular scene too.

And I would suggest you to give room to Olive, James, Sara and Zack a bit more.

Grammar: 12.5/15

There is not much of a problem with grammar. There are some typos though. You can always enrich your vocabulary. And here particularly, you can try to include two or three small sentences in single ones using conjunctions or something?

Uniqueness: 4.5/5

Ofcourse it is. And this is the strongest point of your book. Keep it up.

Hope it helps ~

P.S. Ok, so this went a little overboard. First of all, I am sorry for uploading your review so late. Secondly, I literally loved the book, and teen fiction being my favorite genre also didn't help, so I tried to list down everything I could.