Sherry White and her seven crazy brothers

Apple pie

Hans

Greta woke up from her slumber and smacked her lips. "Why do I have a cottonmouth?"

I cocked my head and arched my brow. "Did you take something?"

"No," Greta shook her head, "I had a brownie."

I opened my mouth.

Greta sniffed the air. "What's that smell?"

Dante and I glanced at each other.

"What smell?" I asked.

"It smells like a skunk," Greta said.

I squinted my eyes since the background behind Greta was moving. Someone knocked on the door, and Dante answered it. I twisted in my living room chair to find Andrew dragging Goldie into the apartment.

"I told you I was okay. Get your hands off me, you peasant." Goldie smacked Andrew's hands.

Andrew stopped and turned to Goldie. "How many times do I need to tell you we don't live in medieval times?"

Dante closed the door as Goldie rushed over to the couch with Greta. "What's up with my sister?"

"Beats me. Your sister keeps telling me I need to slay the dragon. What dragon?" Andrew asked.

When did Andrew get a dragon?

"That's okay. Greta dry humped Hans," Dante told Andrew.

"Ew, why?"

"How the hell should I know?"

I'm still trying to figure out if dragons exist. If dragons existed, would they breathe fire? Can you imagine flying around on one's back? Be gone, you evil doer.

Shit. I need a sword.

Someone knocked on the front door.

Dante answered it while I figured out how to get a sword. "Oh, look. Mom brought pie."

Goldie and Greta jumped to their feet and dashed to Goldie and Dante's folks. "What kind of pie?" Goldie asked.

"Apple. Why?" Liliana asked.

"We'll take that." Greta snatched the pie from Liliana's hands, walked to the open window, and whipped the pie outside.

"Is there a reason you threw out a delicious pie?" Dimitri asked.

"Yes. I hate apple pie." Greta crossed her arms and gave Dimitri a haughty look.

"Since when?" I asked.

Greta craned her head and gritted her teeth. "Since forever, you stoner."

I placed my hand on my chest. "I'm offended."

"Why, because I called you a stoner?"

"No, you tossed an apple pie, you shrew!"

"We don't need apple pie, you blubbering imbecile."

"I beg your pardon. We always need pie."

"Since when?"

"Since forever."

Dante got between Greta and me, put his hands on our foreheads, and kept us apart. Greta swung at me as I batted at her hands.

"Excuse my girlfriend and her stoner brother," Dante told his folks.

"It's fine by me. I haven't seen a good fight in a while," Liliana said.

"Liliana!"

"Satan, you've mellowed throughout the years. I remember when you tried to destroy me."