Love.
Something that I've always believed in. Something my mom taught me is the most beautiful, precious thing in the world. Some people say gives your life a purpose, and some say it completes you.
Some say it's beautiful, some say it's pain. But...
Chapter : 20 - Cause Of Death : My Smouldering Looks!
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It's been a very long time. I missed this.
I often wondered these past few days, how much has changed since the first time I set foot in the campus, was it the city? Was it the new beginning I promised myself before I've come here, or the guy who's sitting right in front of me across the table. Aryan, his presence just made me feel alive.
I wasn't entirely fond of him the moment I saw him back. I felt anger, I hated him with passion. Atleast I felt something. I wasn't empty. Whatever it was, I felt it with passion. I was no longer my old self. But I'm not entirely something new. I'm just somewhere in between, wanting to leave it all behind and start over fresh. And for once, believe in myself. And believe in him.
As I think about us now, it doesn't really make much sense. But I wondered if it has to make sense. For the very first time in years, I listened to my heart, and what it wanted. And what it wanted was to let go of everything and live. Let go of everything and be with him.
So I admitted it, I'm in love with Aryan.
I don't know what would be next? Are we officially dating? Is he my boyfriend? I am confused. No, I am overwhelmed. I have wondered over years, imagined what it would be like to be with him, but it isn't plain imagination. It's real now. He's real, his feelings are real, his lips were real. Which I very much still feel against my lips.
"Annu! Annu? Is something wrong? I've been calling you. Is something wrong with your mouth?" A jab from Abby in my ribs made me slam my palm down which has reached my lips without me knowing, as I finally heard maasi's voice.
I better stop zoning out too much.
I awkwardly looked around the table after gulping my glass of water empty. And nervously smiled at maasi. All eyes were suddenly on me. maasi's concerned, Rupali's glaring, Abby's teasing and Finally his... Knowing and mischievous, sending me a wink.
"I- I'm good." I answered trying not to stutter. There's nothing to be nervous. I guess I didn't say my entire monologue out.
"Annu, you're barely eating. You're just toying with your food. And you've become so skinny. You should eat more." my maasi said as I plastered a nervous smile.
"I don't think so, no amount of dieting would make Annu skinny, but I think she should still make an effort, to be fit... As you have a reputation to keep now... " Rupali muttered the last sentence making me inhale shakily.
Did she just bodyshame me? What a bitch.
But she's nonetheless my sister, and maybe she means well... Just concerned about my health? I justified.
But still a bitch to me sometimes.
" I think she's perfect the way she is, I agree she has become a bit skinny, and maybe should eat more but I guess it's her choice? What makes her happy." Aryan butted in causing me to bite my lip to contain my smile. My hero.
