Getting Better Otherwise||Boris Pavlikovsky

|Fourty-Seven|

  Weeks pass by in a blur. Things seem to go back to the way they were. As if my mom never called me for the first time in like 13 or 14 years. I continued to bury myself in work, days mushing together due to my lack of sleep. I knew I was overworking myself. But keeping my head in files really helped keep my mind off things. Despite me being exhausted and stressed I enjoyed my job almost more than anything.

  Theo, Pippa, Cody, and I have been making an effort to hang out more despite our usually busy schedules. It was nice getting out with them every once in a while though. I felt normal again which I was almost begging to happen, I was tired of feeling like I was sinking into a black hole.

  I was snapped out of my thoughts by a light knock on my office door. The sudden sound made my body jump slightly. I looked up from my paperwork and at my office door, "Come in."

  The door opened quickly, Phoebe stood in the doorway with a small smile on her face. "Good afternoon, you have a visitor." She stated.

  "Who is it?" I asked simply as I began to put away my paperwork for the time being.

  "Um, she said her name was Amelia. She says she knows you somehow and that she would like to speak to you." She explained moving her hair out of her face.

  I stopped everything I was doing, it was like my body froze and I couldn't breathe. A lump in my throat seem to form as my mind raced with questions. It can't be that Amelia can it? I couldn't tell what I was feeling, it was like all my emotions were jammed together and my body wasn't reading the right emotion. A weird mix of anger and confusion rushed over me. Do I have a reason to be upset with her specifically? She never directly did anything to me so why am I so hurt and angry that she's here? What does she want from me is the real question. It's too big of a coincidence that she shows up here only a few weeks after my mom had called.

  "Should I not let her in? You seem rather upset over that name. Did I say something wrong?" Phoebe begins to ramble.

  I forced myself to come back to reality. I looked back up at the woman in front of me and took a deep breath before exhaling slowly. "You did nothing wrong Pheobe, s-send them in." I hesitated.

  Part of me was afraid she showed up with my mother and another part of me felt like I'm overreacting and it's probably not even who I think it is. As I watched Phoebe disappear into the next room and close the door behind her I felt my stomach tie into knots and my whole chest begins to feel tight. I was beyond anxious and I honestly felt like I was going to throw up. I tried my best to keep my breathing steady as I watched the office door open once again.

  In walked a person with short dyed hair, blue and black. They were an average height maybe 5'4" a little taller than me. Their makeup was flawlessly done and they wore black jeans with a baggy band T-Shirt; it looked like a Deftones one. They were around 14 or 15 I'd say. I felt my hands become clammy and shake in nervousness as they stood in the doorway.

  "Um, come in, take a seat." I motioned towards the chairs that were in front of my desk, my voice cracking slightly.

  They nodded, closing the door behind them and walking over to the chair to take a seat. They took a seat hesitantly, almost like they knew I was unsure of how this encounter was going to go. They could probably notice my very visible nervousness. I swallowed hard as I straightened out my desk. "How can I help you?" I asked though it came out sounding slightly more hostile than I was intending.

  I watched as they quickly inhaled and exhaled, "I know I'm the last person you want to see or talk to. But please hear me out and after you can decide whether or not you want to throw me out of here or not." They spoke quickly, almost so quickly it was a little difficult to hear what they were saying.